1.
King Louis XIV is having none of your shade.
2.
Those rumors about Hercules overcompensation were completely true.
4.
Everyone knows you can't abduct Sabine women without getting them coffee.
5.
Milo of Crotona got an ass for days.
6.
Phrenology is a legit science that will definitely not be debunked ever, MO-OM.
7.
Ugh, go fuse into someone else for once.
9.
Is there anything more embarrassing than being force to high five the angel of death?
10.
Looks like the catty androgynous Greek youths are out in force.
12.
Foot to arm melding was how ancient Greek men showed affection.
13.
Even the ancients weren't immune to "Shit who put that coffee table there?!"
14.
Nobody gives the stink-eye like Mary. Nobody.
15.
Are we all just gonna ignore the fact someone hit Grandpa in the face with a shovel?
