1. H-h-h-how did this happen?
2. Where do I even start?
3. My life is in shambles.
4. How did flour get THERE?
5. Everything is sticky and scary and sticky.
6. This pie better taste like liquid sunshine.
7. Maybe the dog will lick the entire kitchen.
8. Can I just hire a cleaning service?
9. What about one of those Baby Mops? Are those real?
10. Should I get a baby and then put him in a Baby Mop?
11. It's like the "before" part of an infomercial…
12. And I'm the person who couldn't even hold a bag of flour.
13. This is a metaphor for my life.
14. What happens if I just leave this here?
15. Nope.
16. TIME TO FACE FACTS.
17. TIME TO BE AN ADULT.
18. A sponge! A sponge! My fiefdom for a sponge!
19. OK, OK. This needs a playlist.
20. Ahhh. Them's the classics...
21. Wait, I own this bowl? Weird. Not my style at all.
22. This eco-safe dishwashing liquid is environmentally conscious but AT WHAT COST?!
23. This is going to take MONTHS.
24. I might as well retire to "focus on my kitchen."
25. I wish my place always smelled like pie.
26. For how many meals could I have pie?
27. Pie for president.
28. What if I died right now?
29. Everyone would assume that I live like this ALL THE TIME.
30. Oh, the horror.
31. If this were a rom-com, I'd spray water on a man, and it'd somehow be sexy.
32. Would my cat find it funny?
33. No, of course not.
34. My cat hates everything.
35. Alas.
36. THIS KITCHEN IS MY EVEREST.
37. I need a break.
38. …But I won't give in!
39. Dish by dish.
40. Bit by bit.
41. Spoon by spoon.
42. Wow, forgot what my counter looked like.
43. Might as well mop?
44. No, I'm going to dance (with a mop!) and no one can stop me.
45. I could be in Stomp, probably.
46. I've got more rhythm than I let people know.
47. This could be a Vine. I should be Vining this dance.
48. Wait.
49. Is this actually done?
50. I ACTUALLY FINISHED.
51. AND THE PIE IS DONE.
52. I AM CHAMPION.
