1. These are the gentlemen of the Creighton Bluejays, and they're about to become your favorite team in all of March Madness.
2. What’s that? You’ve already got a favorite team? Think again.
3. Does your favorite team feature a 3-point shooter like Ethan Wragge, who is shooting an absurd 49% from 3 this year ALL WHILE MAINTAINING THIS BEARD?
4. Look at him. Look at him effortlessly holding that chainsaw. Are you telling me your favorite team is as good as a team that stars a genuine lumberjack?
5. And that beard! One day, there will be halls of fame devoted to that beard, and psalms that will sing its praises, and no, your favorite team has never seen anything quite like it.
6. And when it comes to offense, there isn't a team in the land better than Creighton.
7. Want some numbers? They're No. 1 in offensive efficiency, per KenPom.com. No. 1 in effective field goal percentage. No. 1 in 3-point shooting percentage.
(They're No. 9 in 2-point shooting percentage, probably to remind America that they're only human.)