1. Seth MacFarlane Theorizes About Donald Trump’s Hair (2011)
“Did you fall head first into a cotton candy machine? What happened?”
2. Dave Attell Teases Drew Carey (1998)
“So he goes to the strip club to see a naked woman? He does not need to pay to see a naked woman, he’s there for the music!”
3. Jeff Ross skewers Charlie Sheen (2011)
“Charlie Sheen if you’re winning there’s something wrong with the f***ing scoreboard.”
5. Bea Arthur Embarrasses Pamela Anderson (2005)
Bea casually reads a passage from Pam’s hilariously smutty novel Star Struck hilarity and second-hand embrassement ensue.
6. Jeff Ross Zings Joan Rivers (2009)
“This is such an honor for me, Joan - you were my great great great grandmother’s favorite comedian!”
7. Amy Schumer Mocks Mike Tyson During Charlie Sheen’s Roast (2011)
“You have a slutty lower back tattoo on your face.”
9. Sarah Silverman Rips Into Hugh Hefner (2001)
“Look at that smile on his face…he doesn’t know where he is.”
10. Anthony Jeselnik Gives Charlie Sheen A Piece Of His Mind (2011)
“The only reason why you got on TV in the first place is because God hates Michael J. Fox.”
Anthony is one of the ruthless roasters at the Roast of Roseanne, premiering this Sunday 10/9c on Comedy Central. This could get interesting.
11. Patrice O’Neal Translates Heidi Klum’s Message For Jeff Foxworthy (2005)
“Remember that time you were cold lamp’ at the club and you was like ‘yo wanna hear a joke’ and I was like ‘aight’?”
12. Gilbert Gottfried Waxes Poetic About Joan Rivers’ Private Parts (2009)
“It filled the room with sunshine, and rainbows. A unicorn looked out of it, winking, as if to beckon me inside.”
Wonder what he’ll have to say about Roseanne’s anatomy on the Roast of Roseanne, premiering this Sunday 10/9c on Comedy Central.
13. Ben Stiller Roasts His Own Father (1999)
A bit of a softball, but a memorable - albeit slightly uncomfortable - moment nonethless.
14. Hulk Hogan Gets Reamed By Lisa Lampanelli At David Hasselhoff’s Roast (2010)
“If only you had been smart enough to escape your wife’s camel toe you’d be a lot richer.”