1. First Of All, He’ll Match Patterns With Patterns (With Patterns!) Without Thinking Twice
Oh shut up, it’s not like you even get INVITED to Cannes.
2. He Breaks Things And Laughs About It
Like this guy’s nose, which broke when Bill threw a Coke bottle into the crowd at a celebrity golf tournament in Utah!
5. He Invented “Sexual Awareness Week”
Very few scenes in the history of cinema are as brilliant as this one from “Meatballs.”
6. He Doesn’t Blend In
Well, maybe he does
7. He Keeps Us Caring About Holiday Traditions
And more importantly, about Charles Dickens’ intentions.