3. I’m thinking those nails would pierce right through my hand.
8. I didn’t know Gwyneth Paltrow had a line of Valentine’s Day cards.
9. Let this scary skeleton with cavity-ridden teeth let your loved one know how you really feel.
12. Hold on, is that vampire killing those hearts?
13. I don’t know about you, but I find the rat to be the most disturbing thing about this card.
14. I seriously think that they just slapped some hearts on what is clearly a Halloween card.
15. The cute little frog appears to have a serious thing for Frankenstein.
16. The blood tear is a nice touch, very True Blood.
17. OK, so this is not Halloween-themed, but it’s so horrifying it should be.
18. Missed opportunity, they totally could’ve used the word “boo” on the card.
19. I’m not entirely sure why the Wolf Man needs a knife.
He has claws!