1. Tuna and Jell-o Pie
Also known as the Summer Salad Pie, which Betty Crocker’s Dinner in a Dish Cookbook (1965) dubiously calls “pretty as can be.”
2. Ham and Bananas Hollandaise
3. Hot Dog Fondue
Who knew hot dogs could be so customizable?
4. Perfection Salad
Playing pretty fast and loose with the terms “perfection” and “salad.”
5. Frosted Ribbon Loaf
I don’t care if the frosting is cream cheese-based, it still doesn’t belong anywhere near “pretty layers of ham and egg filling.”
6. Lobster Relish
Is it…is it alive?
7. Jellied Tomato Refresher
Definitely too chunky to be refreshing.
8. Atora Steak Puddings
These look like props from a murder movie.
9. Lime Cheese Salad
The makings of a great meal: citrus, dairy, and a heap of “seafood salad.”
10. Liver Sausage Pineapple
Just imagine the horror of expecting something pineapple-flavored and instead getting a mix of liverwurst, mayo, and Worcestershire. IMAGINE.
11. Super Salad Loaf
“…and pack into bologna shell.”
12. Shrimp Sandwich Roll
Taking something that probably tastes pretty decent and making it look like a log of vomit.
Recipe unavailable online, but found in here.
13. Frozen Cheese Salad
Seems like being on Weight Watchers in the ’70s was kind of bummer, no?
14. Monterey Soufflé Salad
AGAIN with the fish/gelatin/citrus combo?
16. Banana Candle
This one comes from Be Bold With Bananas — which, admittedly, sounds like a must-read — but, guys. GUYS.
17. Snowy Chicken Confetti Salad
What’s most alarming about this one is the impossibility of actually locating the chicken.
18. Glazed Potato Salad
Can we just stop turning everything into loaves?
19. Baked Stuffed Salmon
[Host places dish on table, beaming with pride.]
[Guests flee in tears.]
20. Igloo Meat Loaf
OK, that’s actually adorable.