1. When you try to kickstart each morning with a cup of crappy, generic coffee.
2. When you have to start off your 9-5 grind with a chaotic commute because everyone's trying SO HARD to get to work.
3. When you run into a coworker outside of the office and try to avoid them, but then they see you anyway and you feel like an ass.
4. When you realize the TV lied to you and you can't just casually go out weekdays and look fresh the next day.
5. When your boss gives you too much freedom too soon and you end up destroying everything.
6. When your friends complain about being unemployed, but you secretly miss sitting around doing nothing.
7. And then they constantly want to hang out, but you can't because WORK.
8. When you spend all day on the computer and you feel like your eyes are melting out of your face.
9. When it hits you that this is destined to be the rest of your life.
10. When you're sitting in a cubicle by yourself and you're your only entertainment for the day.
11. When you get home and you're too exhausted to cook, so you're like okay I guess I'll have dry cereal for dinner.
12. And then when you have time to cook, you're like I work hard and I deserve a treat so CEREAL FOR DINNER.
13. When your coworkers talk about getting drinks after work and you're like, nah I have 0 desire to be on that level.
14. When you're heading to the bathroom to poop and you feel like all of your coworkers know what you're about to do.
15. When you try to make business casual happen.
16. When you can't fall asleep and start panicking because you need sleep to be a functional, working adult.
17. When you play games with yourself to get you through the day, like counting down the hours until your next meal.
18. When you spot the only other people you know at a company function and cling to them relentlessly.
19. When people insist on responding to every single group email and you lose control of your inbox.
20. When you try to cope by reminding yourself that you've dreamt of being a working human for your entire life.
21. And then when the end of the day comes and you manage to drag yourself through the door and rip off your pants right before collapsing.
