9 Completely Pointless Infomercial Products That Promise To Make You More Beautiful

    Or just keep your shoes clean and your boobs big.

    Angela Vitello
    by Angela Vitello

    BuzzFeed Staff

    1. NeverWet

    Via lancasteronline.com

    NeverWet is a seemingly magical spray that claims to completely repel liquid from any surface.

    youtube.com
    youtube.com

    How liberating it would feel to just douse yourself in soda?

    2. Hot Ponez

    Via youtube.com

    This is basically just six hair ties in one. But you better be a professional hairdresser if you plan to use one because it's not easy.

    youtube.com
    youtube.com

    I have a hard enough time doing a basic braid.

    3. Stretch Genie

    Via shopgetorganized.com

    Stretch Genie stretches shoes. It's a combination of spray and what appears to be a version of the thing all cobblers use to stretch shoes: a shoe horn.

    Via youtube.com

    Never trust something with the word "genie" in the name.

    4. Air Curler

    Via harrietcarter.com

    For the girl who uses an actual curling iron and thinks, "If only this were somehow easier but less effective."

    youtube.com
    youtube.com

    Even the footage proves that product is nothing but a hair dryer with a bucket on the end.

    5. Kymaro Body Shaper

    Via amazon.com

    Like Spanx but somehow even less appealing.

    youtube.com
    youtube.com

    The full-body corset you've been waiting for! Conveniently, it will be concealed by none of your clothes.

    6. Tag Away

    Via toptvstuff.com|pm|ti|tp|BN

    This product claims to relieve you of bumps and boils "harmlessly" and "without pain."

    toptvstuff.com|pm|ti|tp|BN
    toptvstuff.com|pm|ti|tp|BN

    I don't think I want bits of flesh "falling away" from my body, thanks.

    7. Easy Curves

    Via easycurves.com

    This is kind of like the Shake Weight. Only possibly more pointless.

    easycurves.com
    easycurves.com

    Great for the women who's more bored than you can possibly imagine.

    8. Bust Up Cups

    Don't let the fancy CGI demo fool you — these are just bra pads.

    asseenontv.com
    asseenontv.com

    Guaranteed to boost one's overall sassiness, if nothing else.

    9. Ahh Bra

    Via ahhbra.com

    The bra designed to banish muffin top of the back. Sexy!

    youtube.com
    youtube.com

    It's basically just a sports bra that you can't workout in.

    So are you feeling inspired to buy one of these modern miracles?

    Via guh-gifgarden.tumblr.com