1. Tragic rave look 1: this person.
Even lining her under eye area with sequins could not hide how tired this girl is. Getting dressed probably just completely wiped her out, to say nothing of the hula hooping.
2. Chicer alternative: La Roux’s cool trench and minimalist wrist jewelry.
This outfit must be her visceral reaction to all the bra-wearing, arm party-rocking crazies running around at all her shows nowadays. Also possible: she’s the new Tilda Swinton and she knows it.
3. Tragic rave look 2: bras decorated with daisies.
If this kid in the front looks happy it’s because he’s looking at La Roux and thanking the heavens.
5. Tragic rave look 3: glitter bras as tops (see right).
6. Tragic rave look 4: full underwear as clothing *with fishnets*.
I can see the tweet: “#BoobsInFace #EDC #JEAAHHH”
7. Tragic rave look 5: Underwear as clothing with white platform boots and penises growing from ears.
With ruffs. RUFFS.
8. Chicer alternative: Dressing like a robot.
Two words: Daft Punk. That is all.
9. Tragic rave look 5: a T-shirt that hints both at your drug use and sex life.
10. Chicer alternative: T-shirts with models on them.
The DJs are doing it and they’re presumably at least mostly sober so they’re good people to take fashion cues from.
12. Tragic rave look 6: this Native American headdress.
Are these given away with free money at the RaveReady.com store because I fail to understand, festival after festival, why — THESE — all the damn time.
13. Tragic rave look 7: flag-print Deadmau5 head.
He knows you like him even if you don’t DIY your own mouse face, guys.
14. Chicer alternative: an interesting shiny ornamental head piece.
Empire of the Sun pulls off looking weird without looking like a mess. Hear, hear!
15. Tragic rave look 8: looking like a stuffed giraffe.
16. Tragic rave look 9: neon tutu with goatee, wearable hydration system, and suspenders.
17. Tragic rave look 10: arm parties.
18. Tragic rave look 11: mask parties.
19. Tragic rave look 12: all-over parties.
No alternative looks have been suggested for those who seem beyond help.
20. And here’s La Roux again, just to give you your eyes back.
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