1. Mesh Cut-out Shirt - $145
Finally, something that will really breathe under your heavy winter coat.
2. Pair with “Hand Trousers” - $335
These also come in pink, which is great because black and white are really tame in terms of color palettes for pants.
4. Bell Board - $400
Copy reads: “Transparent chest plaque with bells and leather neck strap | Writing reads, “RING FOR YOUR MOMMY PIECE y.o. 69-12.”
Style over a tank for a more conservative look.
6. Cutout Jacket - $465
Finally a blazer that lets you flaunt your lack of love handles! Perfect for the holiday season when everyone bloats and that’s even more unusual.
8. Complete the look with the matching “Conservative Pants” - $255
Make sure your butt gets the attention it deserves.
9. Jock Strap - $200
The description reads: “Jock strap with LED light at front | Elastic straps | Front padding.”
Bad news about this one: it’s one size only and the elastic waistband only measures 24 inches around. Fashion, so fat-shame-y sometimes.
10. Light Bulb Bra - $250
“Bandeau bra with LED lights at front | Adjustable hook closure.” This one is also one size (about a 34 AA from the sound of the measurements) so thank GOD for adjustable hooks if you happen to be, say, a 36.
11. If you’re on a budget, try the “Butt Hoodie” - $75
And find many more holiday gift ideas for the men in your life where these came from at Opening Ceremony.
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