1. Exactly how one burps is an anomaly to you.
2. You've even Googled it a time or two and can't figure out wtf is wrong with you.
3. And every time you ask someone IRL how to burp they just say "IDK, you just do it."
4. You're actually paranoid that you have a medical condition no one has discovered yet.
5. Trying to burp just gets you somewhere between a fake cough and almost puking yourself.
It's not a pretty sight.
6. Carbonated drinks are the work of the devil.
7. You have a love/hate relationship with beer.
8. And just one bottle of seltzer water is enough to have you uncomfortable for the rest of the day.
9. Your friends and family love to burp around you and tease your inability.
10. And nothing is more frustrating than watching them burp on demand.
Yeah, we get it. You can do it, we can't. And we hate you.
11. Sometimes you literally pound on your chest to try and force the air out.
12. Or do this weird cough thing, which does absolutely nothing 90% of the time.
13. When you really need to burp, working out is the absolute worst.
14. And every time that you breathe in, it just feels like you're adding to the discomfort.
15. People offer to burp you, but like...
16. But sometimes it's so bad you think it just might be worth it?
17. Once every 2-3 months you will burp out of nowhere and it is so. fucking. satisfying.
18. You actually feel like a new person.
19. But then it's straight back to your normal not-being-able-to-burp hell.
