I'm all for treating ourselves kindly and taking the time to do so. However, some advice seems self-affirming and constructive but can be harmful when taken at face value.
1. "Positive vibes only."
2. "If they can't handle my worst, they don't deserve my best."
"Funny how those people are always at their 'worst.'"
3. "The 'how not to give a fuck' nonsense."
4. "Get a mani-pedi and do a face mask."
5. "Do whatever feels right."
"'OK': All serial killers."
"There’s also the problem that sometimes we have to go through some unpleasant things in the short term to get worthwhile benefits in the long term. If you always avoid things that make you uncomfortable, you’re probably stunting your own growth."
6. "Treat yourself."
7. "If people don't like you for who you are, that's their problem."
"No, sometimes you’re the asshole; 9/10, the common denominator rule stands."
8. "Don't be sad; you have everything you need to be happy."
"Even if there’re a few happy things in your life, you don’t need to be ashamed about feeling sad or depressed."
9. "Don't change yourself!"
10. "Follow your heart."
11. "Don't be a victim."
"Had someone tell me not to let my wife feel like a victim after being sexually assaulted.
"I hear people say this a lot because they think it helps real victims feel less like one, but people need to process things. They can't just run through the healing process by pretending it didn't happen."
12. "Always trust your feelings."
13. "Be who you are."
14. "Cut off anyone who doesn't bring you peace."
16. "Man up, keep it together, be strong."
17. "Guilt is a wasted emotion."
18. "Stop texting people first to see who your friends are."
19. "This is a cure (shows a picture of the woods). This is poison (shows a picture of medication)."
"Shut the fuck up — some people need antidepressants to function. Going for a walk in the woods will not just magically cure your depression."
20. "You don't owe anybody anything."
"OK, it’s one thing if we’re talking about an abusive relationship, but this mentality seems to promote childish, conflict-avoidant behavior masked as 'self-care,' aka 'good vibes only.'"
"Ignoring people who care about you or being rude to people shouldn’t be encouraged, IMO. You can take time to yourself without being an asshole or cutting people off without explanation."
21. "You have to love yourself before someone else will love you."
The takeaway is pretty much to love and respect yourself as you are able, and not to forget compassion for others, too! Is there some self-care tip or affirmation that drives you crazy? Let us know in the comments!
Note: Some responses have been edited for length and/or clarity. H/T: r/AskReddit!