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23 Things All Healthyish People Actually Want For Christmas

Pretty sure you can fit "no more hangovers" under that tree.

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1. A delightfully empty gym.

Casey Gueren

2. The ability to squat down without crying after leg day.

3. Avocados that are perfectly ripe at all times.

4. Treadmills with built-in air conditioning.

Comedy Central / Via

5. Sports bras with zero-gravity technology.

MTV / Via

6. Or better yet, sports bras with an eject button for when you're sweaty AF.

7. Organic produce that isn't $87/pound.

8. A teleportation device that gets you from your bed onto a treadmill.

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9. A scale that measures your level of badassery.

Sally Tamarkin / Via BuzzFeed Life

10. Workout clothes that are flattering, comfortable, cheap, and self-washing.

11. 126 likes on your last post-workout selfie.

12. A study showing that pizza basically = kale. / Via BuzzFeed Life

13. The inability to chafe. Anywhere.

14. Hair that washes/dries/styles itself after you work out.

15. Bacon that actually burns calories.

16. The ability to drink all of the things without even a hint of a hangover.

17. A personal chef who specializes in sugar-free donuts that taste like happiness.

Tommy Chheng / Creative Commons / Flickr: tommychheng / Via BuzzFeed Life

18. A ban on the term "bikini body."

19. The removal of sweat glands from...certain places.

20. A really fucking delicious cheat meal.

21. And wine that makes you stronger because why the hell not?

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22. Two extra hours in your day just to exercise and do healthy things. Like, take stairs and buy vegetables.

Sally Tamarkin / Via BuzzFeed Health

23. And, sure, maybe abs if you're like giving them out or something. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

The best things at three price points