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17 Things You Can't Get Away With When You Have A Big Penis

Oh, you thought it was all fun and games?

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1. You can't take take a crap peacefully because no toilet is deep enough to accommodate your length.

If it's not touching the bowl, it's touching the water. Public toilets? I DON'T WANNA TALK ABOUT IT.

7. You can't sleep on your stomach without morning wood uncomfortably waking you up from your slumber.

Showtime / Via

Or, if you're a back sleeper, maybe it's the full-sized blanket tent your penis just erected.

8. You can't wear just any underwear. That precious package you're carrying has special needs.

Warner Bros. / Via

Boxers are too loose, briefs are too tight (not to mention they can stretch into uselessness), and the waist-to-crotch ratio has to be just right. Compression shorts and pouch underwear are usually the way to go.

11. You can't dance with someone or hug them without feeling like the ultimate creep when they accidentally brush up on your bulge.

12. You can't easily find a condom that fits ~just right~.

@heyangle / Via Twitter: @heyangle

Maybe it's because the only one that fits you is out of stock at the pharmacy, or maybe it's because you have to get a custom-fitted one at an online store. It's a struggle either way. (This is NOT to say we're trying to get out of wearing them, but this is a safe space to complain a bit, right?)

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