1. So, this is really about to happen. 'Bout to melt alllll my stress away.
2. It's basically just sitting and breathing, right? Yep, got this.
3. OK, so... legs crossed.
4. Back straight...
5. Eyes closed.
6. Breathe in... Breathe out...
7. Empty your miiiind.
8. This is not going to work.
9. I breathe ALL THE TIME, and my stress is still there.
10. Sounds sketchy. Real sketchy. 🤔
11. Agh, pins and needles in my legs! Uncross, uncross!
12. OMG that's better. OK, where was I? Right... breathing.
13. FOCUS. Focus on your breathing.
14. In through the nose, out through the mouth.
15. Or is it in through the mouth, out through the nose...?
16. Ew no, that feels weird. Definitely in through the nose.
17. Woosahhhh... Is that right?
18. Every thought I have, I'm just going to imagine myself putting it away in a drawer.
19. I'm just going to grab it, and put it away. And then I'll stop thinking about those little thought drawers.
20. I'm taking time out of the day to do this for ME. I got this.
21. Hold up... Is thinking about clearing my mind actually filling up my mind with thoughts?
22. YO... maybe I should be high for this.
23. How do people do this so easily? That's what I really wanna know.
24. There are other things I could be doing tbh.
25. Ah! I forgot to buy more toothpaste! Ughhh...
26. Shit, let's add that to the drawer.
27. OK stop worrying — you'll be fine. Keep those eyes closed.
28. Breathe in, breathe out... Breathe in, breathe out... Focus.
29. These colors popping up inside my eyes are kinda cool.
30. Ohhh, looks like stars!
30. What was that sound?
31. Is that my stomach growling?
32. Is eating allowed while meditating? Is that what ~mindful eating~ actually is?
32. What's for dinner, anyway?
33. There's some stuff in the fridge I could probably put together.
34. But I'm tired — maybe I'll just order in.
35. Pizzaaa.
36. Dammit, PUT IT AWAY IN THE DRAWER.
36. No, you know what, treat yo'self for getting through today — you deserve it.
37. It's been such a rough week. I still have so much to do.
38. Aye! Put that thought in the drawer. It's meditation time.
39. Breathe in... Breathe out...
40. Hey, this actually feels kinda good. I wonder how much air my lungs can hold?
41. Breathe in... Breathe out...
42. Geez, how long have I been doing this for?
*checks time*
43. TWENTY MINUTES? Shit, I got things to do.
