Health·Posted on Dec 17, 201528 Hilarious People Who Gave No Fucks in 2015"I stuck my hand into a coin-filled fountain and used $3.99 of other people's wishes to buy a burrito."by Shannon RosenbergBuzzFeed StaffLinkFacebookPinterestTwitterMail 1. Vodka n Noodles @Dawn_M_ Calm down shouty museum man. I think it's pretty obvious that I know how to ride a dinosaur skeleton. 05:31 PM - 11 Feb 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 2. Patrick Tanner @dptanner Was late to work today because I was busy taking a personality quiz on which Lion King character I am. 02:58 AM - 07 Aug 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 3. Elizabeth Hackett @LizHackett I stuck my hand into a coin-filled fountain and used $3.99 of other people's wishes to buy a burrito. 10:10 PM - 25 Mar 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 4. Rock @TheMichaelRock *wife walks in to see the boys have built a chair fort* Wife: PUT THOSE CHAIRS BACK! Me *climbing out of fort* YOU HEARD YOUR MOTHER! 04:17 PM - 30 Oct 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 5. Baby Swayze @buhsbaby_baby One time I invited a guy over for dinner but I didn't feel like cooking so I just poured us each a bowl of cereal really romantically. 12:15 AM - 15 Jun 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 6. Adrienne Airhart @craydrienne I don't know my own phone number but I do know my best friend's ex boyfriend's aunt's Hulu password. 07:27 PM - 22 Oct 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 7. Meth Lab for Cutie @kiralc I found an old soy sauce packet in my makeup case this morning and had to pretend to be confused 08:21 PM - 02 Feb 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 8. Underchilde @Underchilde Honk all you want, but if I don’t eat these donuts at this green light I’ll have to share them at home. 12:39 AM - 06 Nov 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 9. ess bee fritz @RandomAntics Caught myself absentmindedly drinking a water bottle while peeing, and for a moment knew the phenomenology of a rain gutter. 09:14 PM - 23 Sep 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 10. Scorpicpanda @scorpicpanda I wonder what my 2,570 emails are about. 03:37 PM - 28 May 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 11. Just Bill @WilliamAder Before I buy a leaf blower I want to make sure I understand the rules. We just blow the leaves at each other's houses, right? 03:17 PM - 02 Oct 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 12. Ron White @Ron_White I recently added squats to my workouts by moving the beer into the bottom shelf of the fridge. 05:05 PM - 10 Sep 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 13. mark @TheCatWhisprer one door closes another opens one door closes another opens one door closes another opens - me eating through a chocolate advent calendar 05:19 PM - 04 Dec 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 14. Sarcastic Mommy @sarcasticmommy4 I'm not saying I'm a domestic goddess, but I did just put clothes in the dryer without spilling my wine. 01:08 AM - 10 Feb 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 15. Jake Vig @Jake_Vig I just sent an office-wide email to a business where I no longer work saying "Muffins and Danish in the break room, help yourself!" 02:57 PM - 13 Nov 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 16. Ali Vingiano @alivingiano congrats on your engagement 2 people viewed my linkedin profile this week so things are lookin good over here as well 06:07 AM - 30 Aug 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 17. Abe Yospe @Cheeseboy22 I can't afford a treadmill or a gym membership, so I just walk the wrong way on the airport moving walkways wearing spandex shorts. 10:39 PM - 15 May 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 18. jenny slate @jennyslate Just brushed my teeth then ate a ton of chocolate covered toffee, at this point I should just start peeing in my bed? 02:42 AM - 28 Apr 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 19. Jay @theshamingofjay Friend 1: I was promoted. Friend 2: I got engaged. Friend 3: My wife is pregnant again. Me: One of my selfies almost got 50 likes. 12:42 PM - 27 Dec 2014 Reply Retweet Favorite 20. BB @BookishBunny i guess i'm not sure how to end a relationship correctly walking towards him banging a pan loudly with a wooden spoon did not work 09:23 PM - 25 Jun 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 21. Niles @River_Niles I FOUND MY OLD YOYO AND PEOPLE KEEP ASKING ME TO RUN ERRANDS AND DO STUFF FOR THEM AND I'M LIKE SORRY CAN'T BECAUSE YOYO 08:13 PM - 26 Jun 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 22. Gabby Noone @twelveoclocke *loses an acrylic nail while attempting to open a carton of chocolate milk* I'M NOT A GIRL, NOT YET A WOMANNNNN 03:42 PM - 09 Jun 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 23. Mmmkay? @missekay *takes off bra* *Dorito chip falls out* Nice. 07:08 PM - 13 Mar 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 24. lauren ashley bishop @sbellelauren still haven't fully unpacked from a trip i took in 2009 03:28 PM - 19 Mar 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 25. Hermione Manger @OhNoSheTwitnt Is making the jerkoff motion at every phone call and email I get at work considered cardio? 08:34 PM - 04 Mar 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 26. Kate Hall @KateWhineHall Calculating how many pockets full of playground wood chips I'll need to carry home in order to mulch all my flower beds. 12:31 AM - 29 May 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 27. aka MajorApril @Faceyspace If by "adrenaline junkie" you mean I wait til the last minute to charge my phone then yes. Yes I am. 11:38 PM - 09 Apr 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite 28. ssssss. @semple42 There's this woman in my office who is wearing the same outfit as yesterday and she reeks of tequi......ok it's me. 03:02 PM - 13 Mar 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite Need more buzz like this in your life? Sign up for the BuzzFeed Today newsletter!