The Secret To The Perfect Grilled Cheese Is Mildly Horrifying

Experts being in this case Bon Appétit magazine, whose tongue-in-cheek Best-Ever Grilled Cheese recipe calls for white bread, unsalted butter, American cheese, and that's right...MAYONNAISE.

Update: Bon Appétit does not explicitly call for Kraft singles, Wonder bread, or Hellmann's (they probably make their own mayonnaise from scratch because they know What's Up); the presence of those Brands in the photo above was a unilateral decision made by one of the authors of this post who is ashamed to admit that she does 99 percent of her grocery shopping at a small NYC bodega.

And you better try it before you start throwing any kind of shade.

Update: It is insanely rich but also likely tastes like the grilled cheese of your childhood that you could never figure out how to recreate.

The heat should be like, medium. Not crazy but not too low or it will take forever to make the sandwich. You want to toast it not burn it.

Bon Appétit recommends four slices. BTW if you have the patience to remove four pieces of Kraft singles from those evil individual plastic packages, which is like finding the seam of Scotch tape four times in a row, then good for you. You're already winning. At this point BA also adds fresh cracked black pepper, which is awfully fancy (and yet probably awesome) but we didn't.

We would say to put it directly into your mouth but it's too hot and everyone knows the cutting is the best part. Bon Appétit's recipe also says "After rigorous scientific testing, we’ve determined that sandwiches sliced in half on a diagonal actually taste better."