Free Advice For The Next 9/11 DC Biker Ride

Less pork jokes.

Dear Bikers who participated in the 2 Million Biker ride into Washington DC on September 11th, I hope you had a good time! Just a few thoughts from a resident if you decide to do this again:

1. Know if the “Muslims rally” you’re riding against is really just 23 sad 9/11 Truthers.

Probably not worth protesting:

Not that protesting Muslims is a good idea anyway.

After all, Muslims love their country too, and many of them have died in it’s service.

2. Bring more shiny hand-made mobile memorials. Very nice.

Via Benny Johnson/ BuzzFeed

They are swell.

3. Less ‘Free Pork.’

Via Benny Johnson/ BuzzFeed

No one really wants to eat mystery meat out of the back of your truck and some people might see it as needlessly offensive to the “Million Muslim March.”

Less Muslim “pork” jokes altogether.


Most people will think you are needlessly making fun of someone else’s religion and it will give your group a bad name.


4. More patriotic themed motorcycles please.

5. Less Confederate flags.

Via Benny Johnson/ BuzzFeed

If you want 9/11 to be about remembrance and national unity and all that.

6. More Constitution tattoos.

Via Benny Johnson/ BuzzFeed

7. Less making out in front of the White House and a Prius. It kind of hurts your message.

Via Benny Johnson/ BuzzFeed

8. More hair longer than your wifes.

Via Benny Johnson/ BuzzFeed

9. More bright neon purple bikes.

Benny Johnson/ BuzzFeed

10. Please remember, we all have to get to work in the morning.

11. More intimidating, artistic photos in front of DC monuments.

12. Make an official hashtag. I helps the messaging.

13. Memes can be fun and effective to make a lighthearted point.


Just do not go overboard. The internet will make fun of you.


14. More selfies while riding.

Sara Carter / Via theblaze.com

15. Everyone must ride with a “My other toy has a dick!” sticker.

Benny Johnson/ BuzzFeed

But seriously, enough with the confederate flags.

16. “No!” (stomps feet)

Via Benny Johnson/ BuzzFeed

See ya next year!

17. And please, please knock this bro over next time.

Benny Johnson/ BuzzFeed

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