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This Guy's Text Convo With A Date Has Incited A Heated Debate About Matching People's Energy Levels

Did Troy's date deserve better or is everyone "overreacting"? What's the new social, textual etiquette??

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25-year-old Troy G. from Washington, DC, has the internet feeling all kinds of ways over an old text exchange with a woman who had asked him out to dinner. He made the fatal mistake of responding in a series of "OK" texts, according to some passionate netizens.

Twitter: @OfficialDeTroyt

The texts actually took place in July but it is still going viral — mostly for its reactions.

Troy told BuzzFeed News he's well aware of the attention but he muted the thread 20 minutes after tweeting it at the time.

Basically, in July, Troy woke up to a text from a woman he'd been seeing casually asking him to dinner that week — her treat. His blasé "Ok" response launched them into a conversation about tone, and ultimately led his date to retract the offer.

Troy G.

"It was 9 a.m. so I responded with one eye open but I accepted nonetheless," Troy said.

He wanted to clear up that he fell back asleep for two hours during the time his date followed up her sarcastic "you sound excited" text with a text that read "if you don't want to its [sic] fine."

"I told her that if she would’ve called me that conversation would’ve been a lot quicker and easier cause that same 'ok' would’ve happened but she would’ve heard the tone," Troy added.

He shared the texts to Twitter at the time and it was immediately met with conflicting reactions. Some said he deserved the rejection and others defended him and his texts.

@matthewtate1234 @OfficialDeTroyt Idc what it is. If you just wake up your not replying to anything with hype lol


Over the next few months people continued to dissect the texts and debate who was truly in the ~wrong~.

@OfficialDeTroyt “Ok.” “Ok.” “Ok. “Ok.” I would’ve canceled too lmao

Troy said despite muting the thread he does check to see the responses from time to time, and he's not too bothered by them.

"I truly don’t care about anyone saying how wrong I was — I wasn’t excited, I was sleepy."

"A lot of people say I could’ve faked it, but I don’t get that. Why would you want someone to fake enthusiasm?" Troy asked. "It's honestly either yes or no. I said yes."

@OfficialDeTroyt the "just woke up" thing isn't an excuse 😭 ppl type "LMAOOO" all the time without cracking a smile…

Recently, however, the conversation has not only amplified, but it's gone international, after Raymond Hernandez, 19, of Hesperia, California, tweeted his position on it all. His response has independently gone viral.

you gotta be able to match my excitement .. do this to me & you’re getting cut off so quick

"You gotta be able to match my excitement .. do this to me & you're getting cut off so quick," he tweeted.

Hernandez said he was "shook" when he read the texts between Troy and his date "because if it's someone you have true feelings for, or just someone who sparks an interest, then seeing them is a big deal."

Hernandez explained to BuzzFeed News that something like "matching excitement" over text is that serious.

Raymond Hernandez

"If they don't match my excitement, then it goes to show they don't see us going that far into the future as I do and I would have to start reevaluating what we are," he said, talking about his relationship with his significant other.


19-year-old Mason Hill of Sugar Land, Texas, disagrees wholly. "Text doesn't convey attitude, simple," he told BuzzFeed News after tweeting his own thoughts about it. "If you get mad, that's on you. Because that means you only care about your feelings and is not mature enough to understand the concept."

@OfficialDeTroyt Why are people tripping about this? TEXT DOES NOT CONVEY ATTITUDE!!! I can be enthusiastic as fuck…

"I text how I feel ... I'm a morning person, but not everyone else," Hill added. "If I'm busy, I'ma be quick."

"A relationship takes two. Communication is key."

Jozea-Marie Martin, 19, from San Fernando in Trinidad and Tobago, has a more moderate take on it all. She said she identified with Troy and explained that her friends have often complained about her own "lack of enthusiasm" over text. But she sees where other people are coming from.

I read "ok" in the wrong tone bc that's usually how dry my responses appear 😂 but if you sent me the you need more…

"It was very relatable," she told BuzzFeed News. "I don't think he was wrong for his initial response, however, upon his friend asking for more enthusiasm he could've been a little more polite."

"I always think it's hard to convey emotion with texting as it leaves so much room for misinterpretation ... [But] if someone is trying to do something nice for you, the least you can do is openly show your gratitude and appreciation for their efforts."

23-year-old Sateena from England felt the same. She told to BuzzFeed News that she's felt slighted, or hurt, by people's curt texts.

Idk he could've been a bit more responsive. It's not like he had to fake sounded excited on a phone call... it's a…

"Punctuation and emojis are important," she said. "Communication is so important these days and feelings need to be considered. This whole blasé 'I don't care about how my actions affect others' look is getting really old and boring."

Sateena also noted that it was extra kind of the woman in the text to offer to pay for the meal. "To just text with an 'ok' seems rude."

Keion Adams, 16, from Florida, thought Troy was "seriously tripping" and said he would have handled the situation "the exact same" as his date did.

@OfficialDeTroyt She gave you a chance dawg, she told you to show enthusiasm and you still chilled out, act like yo…

"It is important to match someone's energy while texting because it creates a vibe and a connection with that person," Adams said. "Even in real life when I talk to people I give them good energy so I can get good energy back."

People are so passionate about it that they have even taken to direct-messaging Troy. "To all the people who felt how I felt in that it wasn’t that deep: you are 100% correct that it wasn’t," Troy told BuzzFeed News. "I will admit that I could’ve waited [to respond] though."

In the court of public opinion...the jury is still out on this one.

I swear people need to understand the waking up time frame! Give me a damn minute to wake all the way up before you…

I don't fuck with people like this. Killing my fucking mood.

Tanya Chen is a social news reporter for BuzzFeed and is based in New York.

Contact Tanya Chen at

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