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$11.68 Billion Profit

Exxon posts a record profit for the last quarter; Shell, meanwhile, made a measly $11.6 billion.

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It's the highest quarterly profit of any publicly traded company in the U.S. ever. And it would have been $11.97 if it weren't for that pesky Exxon Valdez court settlement!

I mostly like old, unpopular things, like from 2002. I'm also 102 years old.

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