1. What a taut behind you’ve got there, Mr. Croft.
2. And what a bulging crotch! Point it at that T-Rex. I bet it’ll intimidate him.
3. Oh, you’ve got two guns? They’re mighty big guns, Mr. Croft.
4. But you can holster one in the dark. I can still see you!
5. Better put both away when you’re jumping, and just focus on getting that body from one ledge to another.
6. But you can also just hang out and take your time.
7. You don’t want to miss all of the lovely things to stare at!
8. Anyway, enjoy exploring, Mr. Croft! Get nice and sweaty!
- The State Department has faulted Hillary Clinton for breaking email rules and failing to manage cybersecurity risks as Secretary of State.
- 11 states are suing the Obama administration for telling schools to let trans students use the bathroom of their choice.
- Russia has freed Ukrainian pilot Nadia Savchenko, who was convicted of murdering two Russian journalists in 2014.