Step 1: Have a cup of coffee and repeat these words:
Step 3: Put on your thinking cap.
Step 4: Don’t let the polls get you down.
Even in other countries.
And maybe you’ll steer clear of stuff like this.
Step 6: Do your best to engage the nation’s youth.
So equip yourself with the latest technology.
2. OK, maybe not.
Step 7: Keep your head in the game with some exercise.
But don’t go overboard.
On second thought, skip the gym.
3. Step 8: Listen to your constituents.
Step 9: Avoid distracting extracurricular activities.
Grab a disco nap instead. You’ll need it!
Step 10: Express yourself when you have the floor.
But don’t act like a clown.
And always know when to yield.
Step 11: Hire this kid. You’ll be glad you did when you fail miserably to pass meaningful legislation.
Good luck, and remember…
- A newly unearthed Homeland Security report contradicts Donald Trump's travel ban, saying country of origin is not a reliable indicator of terrorism.
- The White House blocked several media outlets it's been critical of, including BuzzFeed, from a closed-door briefing by press secretary Sean Spicer.
- Hillary Clinton returned to the public arena in one of her first political appearances since the election, urging Democrats to "keep fighting."
- The White House strongly denies reports that Chief of Staff Reince Priebus urged the FBI to undermine stories linking Trump to Russia.