Why Are Koalas So F*cking Charming?

Well, first of all, koalas are arboreal, herbivorous, marsupials. Duh.

1. They have good taste in hats and know how to stay hydrated on sweltering days.

2. They were tree-huggers before it was trendy.

3. Koalas sleep about 18 hours a day…like this. How charming is that?

4. Even though they are from Australia, koalas think Uggs are ugly and prefer Timberlands.

5. They have casual orgies with their friends, no big thing.

6. This one showed up at someone’s house and wanted a cool bath. Only something totally f*cking charming could get away with that.

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7. Koalas are not afraid to scratch their hind quarters in public. They don’t care what you think.

8. Even though they smell like cough drops, pretty girls dig them.

10. Cute boys like koalas, too.

12. Even the Pope is charmed! Though the feeling does not seem to be mutual…

13. Koalas eat about 2.5 pounds of eucalyptus leaves a day, and they look very cute doing it.

16. Koalas don’t need air guitars. Hey, Joe…where you goin’ with that gun in your hand?

17. Koalas are in on the joke.

18. Koalas can make you cry. (Don’t worry, she’s OK! Read the story!)

19. Koalas know how to give thanks. This woman saved this koala’s life.

20. This one survived being hit by a car without even a scratch! Totally bad-ass! And stuck-ass…but no worries, he’s cool.

21. Male koalas have a bifurcated penis; that means it’s forked. Jealous?

22. Hey, I just met you…and this is crazy…

23. This one charmed the shit out of the Kona Krew.

24. My baby is sticking his arm out, ain’t no big thing.

25. Koalas. Totally f*cking charming.

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