I Spent The Entire Day In A Movie Theater And This Is What I Learned
I should have brought a sandwich, for one.
So, I love going to the movies.
I always have, and I've been known to go see a movie in theaters every week or two. A few years ago, I jumped a major hurdle of seeing a movie ~by myself~ for the first time and it was totally life changing. If you really want to see a movie and feel too embarrassed or weird going by yourself, just go for it. It's incredible and so freeing.
However, I have never ever seen more than one movie in a row. Why? I'm not sure. I guess I always thought it would seem like too much, despite the convenience of already being at the theater. I rarely watch movies at home because I get too restless. And it gets in the way of my quality time with TV.
MOVIE ONE - The Purge: Election Year
I arrived at the theater around 20 minutes early, giving me plenty of time to wait in line for tickets and snacks, neither of which had any line whatsoever. I worked out my schedule so that I was seeing what I was least excited to see first (The Purge, which was indeed complete trash) and what I was most excited to see last (Ghostbusters).
Movie Rating: 5/10
Choice Quote: "Every day in Juarez is like The Purge."
Fatigue Level: Very Low
Phone Glances: 12
MOVIE TWO - Finding Dory
The previews and audience of Finding Dory were a very sharp contrast to those of The Purge, understandably. While I'm definitely a Pixar fan, I'm not a die hard one by any means, so while I thought the movie would be enjoyable, I wasn't necessarily dying to see it. It started out slow, and my body and brain both had a "Really, I'm sitting for another two hours?" moment, but by the 30 minute mark I perked up and was overall pleasantly surprised - I barely noticed the time pass.
Movie Rating: 8/10
Choice Quote: "Hello. I'm Sigourney Weaver."
Fatigue Level: Moderately Low
Phone Glances: 4
MOVIE THREE - Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates
I had a decently long "halftime" break, so I walked around and made a quick phone call to stretch my legs. I decided to hold off on any snacks, despite my growing hunger, so I could save my movie binge for the end of the night. I'd need it more then. My minor fears that employees would start to recognize me and question me, or worse, mock me behind their backs, were totally gone. I realized both the employees and the theater itself were far too busy for them to care.
Despite the mixed reviews, I was actually pretty excited for Mike and Dave, mostly because of my passionate love for Anna Kendrick and slightly less passionate but still significant love for Aubrey Plaza.
The movie started off a little clunky - seemed to be a theme today. They wasted no time setting up the plot and getting us to Hawaii. By this point, my body was definitely done with being in the theater, as much as my brain was trying to hang on. I crossed and uncrossed my legs about every two minutes. I was also extremely thirsty and it occurred to me that I hadn't been drinking water. And the fact that these thoughts were going through my mind shows you how gripping this experience was.
There were some great moments in the movie, but this one was definitely the hardest to get through. A lot of wasted potential. I thought both the ladies comedic abilities were underused on characters that didn't suit their natural humor. The audience seemed equally blah about it - there weren't a lot of laughs. Despite the constant action and gags on screen, this movie felt the longest. To be fair, my opinion could have been influenced by sitting in a dark theater for six hours now and slowly dying of hunger.
Movie Rating: 6/10
Choice Quote: "It was for backstage tickets to Rihanna!"
Fatigue Level: Get me out of here already!
Phone Glances: 17
MOVIE FOUR - GHOSTBUSTERS
Three down, one to go! Never had I been more excited for popcorn and Raisinettes. Before that though, I thought I should probably have some substance in my stomach before filling it with pure garbage, so I walked across the street for a taco. It was marginal but satisfying, and left room for plenty of buttery goodness. By then (7:00 PM) the theater lobby was packed - $8 Tuesday draws a crowd.
I have been following the development of the Ghostbusters reboot for a long time, and I was nervous for the result but encouraged by the mostly positive reviews. I understand no remake is ever going to get better reception than the original, but I felt it was pretty important for Hollywood that this movie succeed. I've grown to love and trust Kristen Wiig and Melissa McCarthy, so hopes were high despite my best efforts to keep them low or at least like, medium.
By now it didn't feel like I'd been in the theater for so long. Maybe my body had grown accustomed to it, or maybe the excitement of the audience and the movie I'd been anticipating made it all go away. After Mike and Dave, I walked out in hallway with a feeling of dread, like this final movie was going to be a slog. But it wasn't at all. The popcorn and soda definitely helped too.
This was the most enjoyable film of the day. If you haven't seen it yet, you should. Is it as much of an iconic classic as the original? No. Is it as hilarious and groundbreaking as Bridesmaids? Of course not. But is it a fun romp with some great funny ladies? Yes! I laughed, I cheered. Soundtrack was on point.
Chris Hemsworth definitely helped, erm, keep my attention as well. Funny AND handsome. Swoon.
Movie Rating: 8.5/10
Choice Quote: The title of Kristen Wiig and Melissa McCarthy's cowritten ghost text, "Ghosts From Our Past: Both Literally and Figuratively"
Fatigue Level: What fatigue? Movies are life!
Phone Glances: 2
# This really wasn't as painful, nor as exciting, as I thought it would be
# The more movies you watch, the less daunting the next movie is. I easily could have stayed for a fifth movie by the time it was over. I guess it's like runners high in that way. So that means it's, like, healthy.
# Bring more water next time.
# Nobody cares what you're doing or where you're going, I should stop thinking that they do.
# Stretching is important, and don't put your wallet in your back pocket.
# Movie theaters are one of the only places that you can find a good random sampling of society. All ages, races, classes, genders, political parties etc. love to see movies.
# $8 Tuesdays is super lit, at least at night.
# Seeing movies in theaters can be a very head clearing experience. I recommend it for anyone who's experiencing stress or lack of creative inspiration.
# Don't expect to have a very coherent conversation with your roommate when you get back home. My mind was essentially Hollywood produced mush. But in a happy way.
# I may or may not have already planned to do this again during Oscars season.