Standing your ground in a rodeo arena makes you invisible.
— Gary Busey (@THEGaryBusey) April 6, 2012
Screaming is the hobby of hillbilly's in Montana.
— Gary Busey (@THEGaryBusey) April 6, 2012
Gators have a lot of weapons on their reptilian bodies.
— Gary Busey (@THEGaryBusey) April 6, 2012
The empty saddle comes from too much whiskey.
— Gary Busey (@THEGaryBusey) April 6, 2012
The new magician's next trick is making himself disappear.
— Gary Busey (@THEGaryBusey) April 6, 2012
How does this: twitter.com/Andy_Richter/s…
— Andy Richter (@Andy_Richter) April 6, 2012
...become this? twitter.com/Andy_Richter/s…
— Andy Richter (@Andy_Richter) April 6, 2012
I can't wait to see my sweetheart tmrw! I'm gonna hug him, kiss him & tell him that I'm so blessed to have him :-)
— Amber Rose (@DaRealAmberRose) April 6, 2012
I hate people who remind you that millions of microbes live on your skin and eat you all day. Oh, I just did it.Sorry.
— Judd Apatow (@JuddApatow) April 6, 2012
my very own bottle of "platinum"patron. Life is a party yfrog.com/kjje5rgj
— Cee Lo Green (@CeeLoGreen) April 6, 2012
Great...went on a date....got a terrible tummy ache at dinner...then proceeded to drop SBD's the entire walk home #howtonotgetlaid
— Adrianne Curry (@AdrianneCurry) April 6, 2012
Am on the loose ! RT @Bababear1 @cher who is the man in your life?
— Cher (@cher) April 6, 2012
Everyone has one! Who is your Thursday night heartthrob?? Mine is @JohnStamos xoxoxoxo :) <3
— Courtney Stodden (@CourtneyStodden) April 6, 2012
Downton Sixbey premieres next week on Late Night instagr.am/p/JD-XY-vZ9x/
— jimmy fallon (@jimmyfallon) April 6, 2012
If you fail a college course and gotta call your parents and tell em, that's the longest phone conversation ever.
— Jay Pharoah (@JayPharoah) April 6, 2012
As popular as Elmo is I don't think Kermit is buying it.
— max greenfield (@iamgreenfield) April 6, 2012
Super creepy.Not only did the Tooth Fairy blow off our kid last night, there was an empty bottle of wine and 2 glasses on the counter.
— Ana Gasteyer (@AnaGasteyer) April 6, 2012
I feel better about my credit card statement when I pretend Chase is complimenting me. "You have an *outstanding* balance."
— Max Silvestri (@maxsilvestri) April 6, 2012
The ultimate Barbie @nickiminaj & the ultimate doll @kimkardashian hanging @TodayShow!!!instagr.am/p/JFHEsGuSyq/
— Kim Kardashian (@KimKardashian) April 6, 2012
"Tweeting is Succeeding" (spread it around, we'll all feel better about ourselves)
— Jimmy Kimmel (@jimmykimmel) April 6, 2012
SBD= Silent But Deadly. I thought this was very common knowledge? :P
— Adrianne Curry (@AdrianneCurry) April 6, 2012
Last nights rap along to jay-z's ni**as in paris went as smooth as crunchy peanut butter
— Crystal Harris (@CrystalHarris) April 6, 2012
I hate it when charities claim they'd be happy if they "saved just 1 kid." I bet behind closed doors they'd be bummed. "We only saved 1"
— chris pratt (@prattprattpratt) April 6, 2012
Eating a bag of Sun Chips while listening to Judy Collins' "Both Sides Now" is the saddest thing you (I) can do (am doing right now).
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) April 6, 2012
Interesting that we accept Jesus coming back from the dead but a comeback for Brandy seems unlikely.
— billy eichner (@billyeichner) April 6, 2012
Partying with @Schwarzenegger at the opening of @Mixology101 ! Always great to see the Governor... yfrog.com/ob2hexdj
— Mario Lopez (@MarioLopezExtra) April 6, 2012
