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1. From a high school student: "I didn't exactly READ the book, but I did watch the movie, and my mom made me turn on the closed captioning."
2. From a parent: "Sorry, Jonah didn't do his math homework last night. I promised him he could complete the next level in his video game and it took him all night!"
3. From a fifth grader: "My grandmother died again."
4. From a first grader: "My mom hasn't finished it yet but she'll turn it in as soon as it's ready."
5. From an eighth grader: "After I heard Justin Bieber was arrested, I was too upset to do the reading."
6. A student had been absent for a few days before a long term assignment was due. From the father: "My son didn't have the same opportunity to procrastinate as the other students."
7. From a 6-year-old: "I couldn't do my homework because I was shaving my legs." Umm, no.
8. From an 11th grader: "I did my homework but I forgot to write it down."
9. Another 11th grader: "Miss, I did my essay. I got in my truck and put it on the seat beside me. Then, a mile out, my truck stopped cold with a horrible whining noise and bright lights! Then the side door opened and this little gray man TOOK MY ESSAY!"
10. After catching a student cheating on his math homework. From the parent: "The only reason he cheated is because he didn't know the answers. Otherwise, that never would have happened."
11. And here's one we know to be true: "My dad spilled coffee on my homework and then caught it on fire while trying to dry it in the microwave."
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