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1. When a customer starts to complain about everything
I have no time to waste, I'm here to work.
2. When they wish you a good weekend even though they know that you're working the whole weekend.
3. "Weekend" is a sensitive word, please use it carefully.
4. When you realize you're working on EVERY weekend.
5. When you're right and they're wrong
6. When you hear the first Christmas song
7. "I want to talk to the manager!" Well I'm the manager.
8. When someone asks, "are you open?"
Breaking news: we're human beings, we cannot be open.
9. When a customer calls you by your name
10. When you realize that time is absolutely not passing.
Five minutes feel like an eternity.
11. When you realize that SALES ARE COMING!
Brace yourselves, brothers and sisters.
12. Talking about sales, this is how it looks to us.
Be brave, sisters. Be brave, brothers. We will survive if we fight together.
13. When people are talking about their wives, kids, husbands, cats or dogs for HOURS.
14. What you wish you could do to some kids.
15. When some men think that saying "good morning, how are you?" means "hey let's have sex right now."
16. What you want to do when a customer comes in two minutes before closing.
Fight me!
17. When you say hi to customers and they completely ignore you.
18. "Oh, you're here again?"
19. If you're insulting us and we're still smiling, it's because we're also insulting you but silently.
20. "It's not scanning, must be free HAHAHA."
21. When customers start to fight.
22. Kids screaming and running everywhere.
23. That feeling when inventory is done.
I've seen hell but it's over now.
24. When a customer says hi or thank you.
25. When a customer recognizes you on the bus.
26. The "when terrible, horrible customer is not looking" look:
27. When you found out what kind of precious gifts they left for you, in the fitting rooms
Poop, tampons, pads, condoms, pee, cigarettes, trash, food, price tags, blood.
28. When they ask you if you're also on sale.
And they really meant it.
29. When you finally have a weekend off!
30. And when you have a weekend off but one of your colleague is sick so your boss ask you if you can replace them.
31. But not all of the customers are jerks or idiots. Most of them are kind and funny.
32. But if you have to deal with idiots who don't say hi or ask you stupid question just to piss you off, just respond: "Hodor."
33. And keep in mind that: "The aisles are dark and full of terror."
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