1. Don't let anyone butter your muffin.
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Don't have sex with strangers. Basically.
2. Relentlessly bully your Dad's new girlfriend.
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Maybe don't do that one...
3. Stay with the person you marry
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Or you'll be judged by mini-lohan.
4. Keeping your fingers and arms crossed is a sure fire way of making sure everything goes to plan.
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Well... do it then!
5. If you're going to drink do it inside the house.
6. There's not even any hidden context here.
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...don't be a mean girl.
7. Perfect IS boring.
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Keep doing what you're doing.
8. Never wear pink and orange glittery satin assymetric crop tops.
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I think this is one important lesson we all needed to know.
9. Plaid shirts and pigtails are always a good look.
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But seriously, confide in your good friends and stuff.
10. Lie-ins are crucial.
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If you don't have a lie in you might end up switching bodies with your mother and that would not be good. Although it may lead to some hilarious japes.
11. Go ALL out on Halloween.
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At least you'll stand out among the sexy animals.
12. Keep calm and carry on.
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Keep time free to chill. Jamie Lee Curtis says it. You do it.
13. Hair always looks sexy pushed back.
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What? It does. It means I can see more of your beautiful face.
14. Watch where you're walking.
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My mum taught me that one too.
15. And finally... Stay fabulous.
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Lindsay 4eva!
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