1. You drank in Dolores park in high school—and you still do.
2. You look like Megan Draper Does Hawaii the moment the sun comes out.
3. You've never been to Alcatraz nor ridden a cable car and never plan to.
4. You avoid Pier 39 like the plague.
5. You knew what a scorpion bowl was, but couldn't remember once you finished it.
6. You have a strong love/hate relationship with MUNI.
7. You'll travel across the city for quality ice cream.
8. You have a favorite homeless friend in every neighborhood.
9. You know how important a REAL burrito is to your general survival.
10. You know Summer looks like this.
11. Vegans, locavores, paleo, and raw diets are part of the vocabulary.
12. You've smoked with someone's parents (bonus points for grandparents).
13. When someone says they're from San Francisco, you ask them to specify, just to make sure they don't mean somewhere like Sacramento or Walnut Creek.
14. When your office looks like this, and you know more about startups than you realize.
15. If this parking sign is normal.
16. When your real estate broker looks like this.
17. "Small batch" and "artisanal" is a big part of your life.
18. You're always complaining about gentrification.
19. This is your medicine.
20. This is how you celebrate.
21. Your car looks like an extension of your closet because of micro-climates.
22. You consider walking as adequate exercise.
23. When people from out of town say "hella", you look at them like this.
24. Knowing and loving this.
25. You watch a lot of bad 90s movies just because they're filmed in SF.
26. You probably have a food blog that you keep secret.
27. And this whole scene isn't weird to you.
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