Music

What's The Deal With Jazz?

My hands automatically clench into fists when I hear someone scatting.

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Because this is all I hear when I listen to jazz.

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And how can anyone truly take scatting seriously? Are you people for real?

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Not even Muppets can get away with jazzin' out.

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And Muppets make EVERYTHING good! Well, everything else.

But really, the worst part of despising jazz is when people say, "No, no, you just haven't heard the good stuff! Blah blah blah Miles Davis Charles Mingus blah blah blerg."

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Actually, I have. I have, and I hate it. So stop trying to convince me otherwise, you sax-loving freaks.

In closing, if this is your idea of a good time, then please don't invite me to your improv jam.

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I think I'll stick to music with actual structure, thankyouverymuch.

Editor's note

This post has been reinstated after it was brought to our attention that the author deleted it, against our editorial standards.