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Going On Tour: Expectations Versus Reality

Sure, it's fun...except when you have to carry your own equipment.

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EXPECTATION: Tour is a 24/7 PARTYZONE.

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Between the shows and the after-parties, you're tearing it up like crazy.

REALITY: You'll be doing WAY more waiting around than actual shredding.

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Waiting to get to the venue, waiting to load in, waiting to load out, waiting to soundcheck – you get the picture.

EXPECTATION: Fun and hijinks in the van!

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PRANKS AND SING-ALONGS GALORE!

REALITY: Sleeping as much as you can before it's your turn to drive.

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You're SO TIRED from staying out until three last night.

EXPECTATION: You and your bandmates are going to best-friend bond.

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Well, this will be at least kind of true.

But also, REALITY: You get wayyyyy too close for comfort. Everything they do annoys you.

Like, why do they have to BREATHE that way?

EXPECTATION: Junk food all the time!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Um, FRIES AND BURRITOS AND POTATO CHIPS, FOREVER? Yessssss.

REALITY: Junk food ALL. THE. TIME.

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You're two weeks in, you haven't consumed any vegetables except for the lettuce that comes on burgers, and you feel like you're about to actually die.

EXPECTATION: As much free alcohol as you can drink!

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In between green rooms and drink tickets, you're going to be practically swimming in whiskey.

REALITY: You are regularly and deathly hungover.

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You wake up at 8 in order to be sick in a moving van for hours and hours. Sounds like fun, huh?

EXPECTATION: Interviews that allow you to speak about your individual passion for music.

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Finally, a chance to express your love for the craft!

REALITY: Getting asked the same questions all the damn time.

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You're so tired of having to say who your "influences" are.

EXPECTATION: Being the coolest-looking person in the room. You're in a BAND, after all!

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Musicians are the flyest humans around, right?

REALITY: Getting dressed from your own merch table because you haven't had the chance to do laundry in a month.

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Well, not if they've been wearing the same socks for six days.

EXPECTATION: You're surrounded by fans, friends, and groupies!

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Everybody wants a piece of you!

REALITY: Having literally NO alone time. None.

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Between the driving, the parties, the shared hotel rooms and apartment floors, and tour life in general, you'll only have privacy in the bathroom. And maybe not even then.

EXPECTATION: And speaking of groupies...you're going to be swimming in them, right?

YOW.

REALITY:

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WRONG. Groupies are less common than you might think, and even if they do come around, you won't have the time or privacy to do anything about it.

EXPECTATION: When all is said and done, you'll have created incredible memories that will last you the rest of your life.

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Tour stories = the best stories.

REALITY: Yeah, pretty much.

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Now take a load off for a while! Or until the next record comes out, at least.

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