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Conflicts In Romantic Relationships

Interpersonal Communication - Find Which Grey's Anatomy Character You Are Based on How You Deal With Romantic Conflicts.

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1. Romantic Relationships: The state of romance in America

Pew Research Center

You probably know many people who are married or maybe you are one of them. Romantic relationships are part of our lives, and we all want our relationships to be successful even though this isn't always the case.

2. Conflicts


In different relationships, conflicts occur either more or less frequently. According to John Gottman, founder of the Gottman Institute and the University of Washington’s Love Lab, 69% of marital conflicts never get resolved. Don't think only about yourself, take a deep breath when fighting with your significant other so that you don't say something you'll regret in the future.

Conflicts are the dark side of romantic relationships that could potentially destroy your relationship with your significant other. By knowing how to deal with fights and disagreements with your partner, the future of your relationship will be more likely to end up reaching the bright side of any committed relationship, success.

3. Selfishness vs. Agreement


It's not about you, it's not about your partner, it's about your relationship together! Two of the reasons we fight with our significant other are because

there is a perceived incompatibility in goals or a perception of insufficient resources. There shouldn't be room for selfishness in relationships, and you should be willing to compromise on things for the sake of your relationship.

4. Communication Skills


As Epstein et al. (2013) showed in their research, communication skills are essential for the success of a relationship. The study also indicated that men outscored women in conflict resolution and that relationship skills improve with age. Communication skills are crucial and we should work on improving them everyday because they might change the future of our relationships.

5. Conflict Resolution


Fights aren't the only part of a romantic conflict, so are conflict resolutions. Couples argue, that's a fact, but the key is how they resolve their disagreements. Conflict resolution isn't an easy process, but couples need to go through it in order to maintain their relationships. It takes courage and humility to go one step further towards fixing the problem. In this case, men outscore women in conflict resolution as Epstein et al. found in their study (2013).

However, at the end of the day it shouldn't matter who takes the first step as long as it's not always the same person doing it all the time. Remember, relationships are about the two of you, and not just about yourself!

6. Divorce Facts

McKinley Irvin / Via

Couples have fights everyday for different reasons, and sometimes they can't overcome certain difficulties which cause them to end their relationship. When this happens, if the couple was married, they get divorce and continue their lives separately.

7. TV Shows Also Portray Conflicts

Google / Via

Romantic conflicts not only happen in real life with real relationships, but also in fiction. TV shows have portrayed conflicts in relationships for forever and people are exposed to it everyday. Going back to the 90's, we found the popular TV show "Sex in the City" where we were able to see how finding love seemed complicated and even though you don't have a serious relationship, conflicts still occur.

Moreover, popular TV shows such as "One Tree Hill" (2003-2012) showed us how high schoolers dealt with romantic conflicts, and then how they handled adult romantic situations from season five on. Later in 2005 and still airing now in 2016, "Grey's Anatomy" displayed the romantic lives of multiple couples that cohabited in the same hospital. Only two years after "Grey's Anatomy" was broadcast, in 2007, "Gossip Girl" focused on upper-class adolescents and their romantic lives and conflicts in Manhattan.

"Scandal" is one of the most recent shows that was broadcast for the first time in 2012, and it shows us more of a political life where romantic relationships are involved and which include affairs and conflicts. These are only a few of the TV shows that contain romantic conflicts, but all of them portray different situations that occur in real life in one form or another when it comes to fighting with our significant others.

8. Personality Quiz

Find out which Grey's Anatomy character you are based on your behavior in romantic relationships. Click here!

9. References

* Epstein, R., Warfel, R., Johnson, J., Smith, R., & McKinney, P. (2013). Which relationship skills count most? Journal of Couple & Relationship Theraphy, 12, 297-313. doi: 10.1080/15332691.2013.836047

* Gottman, J., Levenson, R., & Woodin, E. (2001). Facial expressions during marital conflict. The Journal of Family Communication, 1(1), 37-57

* Irvin M. (2012, October 30). 32 shocking divorce statistics. [Web log comment]. Retrieved from

* Madden, M. & Rainie, L. (2006, February 13). Romance in America. Pew Research Center. Retrieved from

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