“Pete had been observing me washing the pots for a few days before he took over and began completely and perfectly imitating me! The monkey on his back is a baby female called Pea. She is not his daughter. Pete had an unfortunate overbite which made him a particularly ugly monkey; he had very little success with the ladies and therefore looked after babies a lot.”
- Donald Trump broke with decades of US policy by speaking with the president of Taiwan Friday, a move that could anger China.
- A jury failed to reach a verdict Friday in the case of Michael Slager, a former South Carolina officer charged in the fatal shooting of Walter Scott.
- The CEO of Zenefits plans to step down after 10 months on the job. A legal mess nearly sank the company this year.
- A UFC fighter is asking people to crush apples with their bare hands 🍎💪