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Why Turtles Are So Much Better Than Cats

Turtles and tortoises are perfect in every way, and yet the internet is still dominated by cats. I honestly shouldn't need to explain this to you guys, but here's why you should be giving turtles your attention instead.

Regarding toilet paper: / Via

Cats shred the crap out of it.


But turtles will fold the ends for you.

Regarding laptops: / Via

Cats will prevent you from getting any work done.

But turtles will type up your report.

Regarding birthdays: / Via

Cats will leave you hairballs and an assortment of dead rodents as "presents."


But turtles will throw you a party.

Regarding dinner:


Cats get their hair all over the food.


But turtles observe the rules of etiquette.

On getting wet: / Via

Cats hate it, hate you, and temporarily lose cuteness points. / Via

But all is right with the world when turtles are wet.

Regarding dogs: / Via

Cats are prone to bullying them. / Via

But tortoises will be their bffs.

Regarding asking for a loan: / Via!!-1!!r!!r!!r!!128!!r/%E5%8F%AF%E7%88%B1%E5%A3%81%E7%BA%B8/9

Cats think your dream to open a used book store is a terrible idea.


But turtles believe you're worth the risk.

Regarding coming home from work: / Via Flickr: tomitapio

Cats don't care if you've had a bad day at work. / Via

But turtles will always greet you with a smile.

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