1. A precious double bird gnome you can sit just about anywhere to serve as the gatekeeper to your limited effs.
2. A desk plate that is a clear warning to anyone who approaches you that you prefer to keep your personal space BS-free.
3. A bottle of seasoning so you can trade the Bull Shit for some Special Shit, Good Shit or Chicken Shit sure to change your life for the better. (Or at least your next meal.)
4. A crazy convenient CouchCoaster to hold a cup or bottle of your fave drink close at all times — because coffee, whiskey, and rosé will always keep it real.
5. And a pack of reusable bottle stoppers so your loyal wine, champagne, or beer can stay as fresh as the crap you have to deal with daily.
6. A bullshit button for alerting everyone you know — even if it’s just yourself — as soon as you are hit with a fresh round of the funky stuff.
7. A two-hand middle finger rearview mirror hanger that'll take your No Bullshit Tour on the road.
8. A No Bull Bullsh*t card game to upgrade your BS-detecting skills to unimaginable levels.
9. A Kaleidoscope vinyl so you and Kelis can yell "Caught Out There" at the top of your lungs — because you hate BS SO MUCH right now (and forever).
10. A Sound+Sleep machine for drowning out all the crap you don’t want to hear — and replacing it with the sweet sounds of nature. *relaxing sigh*
11. A fierce cuff bracelet to prove just how unfuckwithable you truly are.
12. A pretty notebook with a mantra you can recite daily while letting the BS know who’s boss.
13. A subscription to Gaia for access to thousands of videos that'll help you disconnect from the madness while reconnecting with your more conscious self.
14. A BULLSHIT coloring book to look the BS directly in the face and attempt to color it away.
15. A poop emoji night light that'll keep your life path shit-free, even when making a midnight run to the potty.
16. A Love Is Art kit so you and your sweetie can can release some stress while taking DIY to freaky new levels — surely enough excitement to help you completely forget the BS of the day.
17. A key chain to inform the world that — unlike some perpetrators — you have no problem celebrating the hot mess that is your life.
18. A copy of On Bullshit for an in-depth look into bullshit and what it may really mean for those who encounter and spread it. (Prepare to be shooketh).
19. A vibrant tote bag that’ll give the pleasant greeting you don't feel like saying yourself.
20. A gorgeous pair of rainbow coupe glasses so your evening wind-down will always have a touch of magic. Just what you need to motivate you to fight the BS another day.
21. A pair of minimal slides to let your over-it-ness be known from head to damn toe.
22. A doormat guaranteed to keep any unwanted guests — and all their BS — from your home.
23. And a beekeeping kit if you want to replace your entire BS-filled crew of besties with some new damn bee-sties.
Keep CALLING it like you SEE it.
The reviews for this post have been edited for length and clarity.