1.
Mondays.. 😂
2.
Damn 3 day weekends make you forget you got a damn job
3.
I don’t know who needs to hear this but living your life to the fullest does not have to involve hiking
4.
I just think it’s fucked up that couch sleepy never directly translates to bed sleepy
5.
Adulting is so fake like just admit you want to eat a meat platter why are you calling it a "charcuterie board?"
6.
absolutlely despise when a recipe tells me to add 2 cups of onion. they don't come in cups. they come in onions
7.
Adulting is putting back a pack of chicken for $12.25 because you see one for $11.93😃
8.
She's a 10, but she's a 14, an 8, and a 12. She just wants to be able to buy pants online, but clothing sizes for women are bullshit.
9.
The worst part of being an adult is that you can FINALLY stay up as late as you want and eat whatever you want but you feel like shit if you do.
10.
32 in the suburbs is 45 and 32 in the city is 22. I can’t explain but I’m right.
11.
Person in their 20’s: “Wow, I thought you were my age.” Me: “Yeah. Same. Anyway, this is the sunscreen I use.”
12.
This adulting life is too hard. One minute you’re rich, the next minute,, you’re a mathematician.
13.
yea
14.
I did not expect socks to be such an important item in my adult life. Socks for sleeping. Socks for walking. Socks for being in the house, on a cool day, on a cold day. Socks for being outside.
15.
Cant seem to sleep. Let's see if the bright light of my phone containing all the information in the entire world held inches away from my face for the next 15 minutes manages to lull me into a peaceful slumber.
16.
When you wake up thinking it’s the middle of the night but you check your phone and your alarms going off in 3 mins #loveisland
17.
"wyd after work" going to bed bro i ain't no super hero..
18.
all those galaxies with trillions of planets inside and we ended up on the one with a 40 hour work week
19.
Doing teletherapy from your childhood home is kind of like “reporting to you live from the scene of the accident”
20.
Love to visit my parents, have a nice family dinner, relax together, and then have a detailed and intense session of end of life financial planning and document locations.
21.
how parents go from "sex is bad" to "I want grandkids" should be studied.
22.
one thing about parents they gonna make a "playful joke" that just absolutely ruins ur whole week
24.
in a toxic relationship with putting away my laundry
25.
I asked my wife if she had any plans tonight and
26.
the trick to getting through life is having a holiday booked
27.
please stop thinking you’re old please enjoy your youth