Look, I consider myself a "smart person." I read the news. I do crosswords. I remember how to keep my 18 houseplants alive.
But after playing Wordle and all of its spinoffs, I’m now wondering…am I actually stupid? If a few word games can bring you to your knees, that’s bad, right?
Enjoy my mental breakdown as I try five of the hardest Wordle spinoff games in the world:
As a map nerd, I’m good with directions. But I suck at remembering the shape of a country. Both of these things matter on Worldle. I do try to memorize hints — "Oh yeah, Italy, shape of a shoe." But is it a boot? A heel? God forbid, Crocs?
Thankfully, Worldle only allows you to play once a day. That gives you enough time to recover from the secondhand embarrassment.
WordleCup.io is proof that people are willing to destroy their friendships if given the chance.
The game works like a multiplayer tournament, where you make private rooms or join public matches. To win, you have to guess the most words before everyone else.
The random matchmaking here is cool if you don’t like to wait for people (or, um, have no friends).
Guessing one Wordle every day without losing your streak is hard. But finding eight at the same time? Ridiculous.
Anytime I see a Twitter mutual post their daily Octordle score, I make a mental note to never cross them. I’m sorry, but you’re a walking red flag now.
Math is my kryptonite. If it enters life as anything except a shopping list, I start sweating. So take it with a grain of salt when I say that NERDLE IS THE WORST.
If you’re taking AP Calculus or actually enjoy math, I see the appeal. Nerdle makes you guess an entire equation. But it's not for me.
5. And finally, Semantle
You know a game is intense when it tells you to feel good about how close you got without actually finding the answer.
Semantle uses a neural network to understand how meanings link words. To play and win, you type in words that have to get closer and closer to the meaning of the day’s secret word.
For example, if today’s secret word is "pancakes," then "syrup" is a closer guess than "liquid," but "liquid" is a closer guess than "eyeshadow." (Yeah, I’m not over Euphoria yet.)
If you actually win Semantle on your first try, buy a lottery ticket the same day.
I didn’t think my first post on BuzzFeed would be a self-roast. But hey, life works in mysterious ways. See ya next time!
