"Some people my age have kids and I’m googling 'house plants that are impossible to kill' diversity is beautiful."

Tom Vellner • 4 days ago

Did someone say maple tahini dressing?!

Tom Vellner • 5 days ago

Mother Nature did not have to go this hard. But she did.

Tom Vellner • 7 days ago

"There are two drunk men outside my window and all they're saying is 'NO, you're MY best friend in the whole world' back and forth."

Tom Vellner • 8 days ago

It's time to let go of that expired sunscreen.

Tom Vellner • 14 days ago

"Does anyone else write things they already did in their planner just so you can cross it out and feel accomplished?"

Tom Vellner • 21 days ago

BRB, swapping my bed for a hammock.

Tom Vellner • 25 days ago

Take a deep breath, and begin.

Tom Vellner • 26 days ago

"I know, let's put stickers on every single piece of fruit sold in America!" —Satan

Tom Vellner • 28 days ago

Caring for them doesn't have to succ.

Tom Vellner • 29 days ago

Bay-leaf in yourself.

Tom Vellner • One month ago

A bubbling bath in a volcanic crater, anyone?

Tom Vellner • One month ago

We're ROOTing for you.

Tom Vellner • One month ago

Four-day workweeks? Count me in.

Tom Vellner • One month ago

How well do you know the plant kingdom?

Tom Vellner • One month ago

Therapist: "Do you get anxious?" Me: "When I'm awake, yes."

Tom Vellner • One month ago

From fanfic to Facebook groups.

Tom Vellner • One month ago

Always. Wear. Headphones. H/T Reddit.

Tom Vellner • One month ago

Toxic? No. Gorgeous? Yes.

Tom Vellner • One month ago

The Amazon reviews are GLOWING.

Tom Vellner • 2 months ago