Silky complexion. Hourglass figure. Polished wood.
Now that I have your attention, I present to you the best thing in my kitchen: this Chemex coffeemaker!
If you saw that photo and were like "WHAT IS THIS SORCERY," allow me to explain The Good News of how a Chemex makes coffee (in five easy steps).
If you're a visual learner, this chart should help explain:
So, why do I love thou, Chemex coffeemaker? Would thou care to listen as thine admirer counts the ways?
First and foremost, Chemex coffee essentially makes love to your tastebuds.
Second, the mindfulness that comes from slowly pouring hot water over this lil' cutie is my favorite form of self-care.
I get that it's convenient to press a button on a Keurig or Mr. Coffee machine, stare blankly as it makes some strange noises, and bam: It spits out brown water that gives you the jitters. But picture this instead:
You set aside 10 minutes of your morning. You boil some water in a lovely gooseneck kettle. You gently pour it over freshly ground coffee beans and watch as steam rises and coffee slowly drips into a gorgeous glass carafe. It allows you to slow down, catch your breath, and focus on nothing but the task in front of you. You then sip from your warm mug, knowing that this is your very own creation you didn't use anything digital to make. That is the magic of a Chemex.
Third, this thing is sturdier and easier to clean than my own human body.
And finally, it's chic as hell! There are no wires, it's beautifully designed, and your friends are guaranteed to ask "What is that??" like you're some sort of mysterious Parisian barista who smokes little cigarettes on their fire escape.
But don't just take it from me — Amazon reviewer J. Holmes says it best, TBH:
"I've been through a lot of coffeemakers, and hated them all 'til now. My biggest issue has always been cleanup! I'd leave coffee grounds in, be too lazy to clean it up later, get mold growing in the coffeemaker's reservoir. The Chemex solves all these problems AND makes a stunning cup of coffee. Making the coffee takes a bit longer, as you basically have to spend about five minutes or so watching and pouring... however, it's fun to do! I actually look forward to the task."
Side note: J. Holmes is a star Amazon customer and has been updating this Chemex review since 2009:
"Update: Well, I've had this coffee maker for about 8 months now, and I'm still loving it.
Update: Well, I've had this coffee maker for over 3 years now, and I'm STILL loving it. Works as well as it did the day I got it.
Update: Well, I've had this coffee maker for over 5 years now, still loving it, and still my only coffee maker.
Update: It's past 6 years now, still my only coffee maker and still loving it."