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What Will Happen Now That It's Cold In Australia

The second great Emu war is upon us...

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Canberra will cease to exist.


The country has to ration all it's energy and purpose, therefore as a cost cutting measure, Australia will no longer acknowledge the existence of Canberra. A large cloud of fog will fall over the city, and it will be replaced by a large lake on the Australian map.

The second emu war will begin.


The Emu clans are naturally prepared for the winter with their thick feathers. They will use the Australian people's weakness to their advantage and launch a campaign to take over Australia entirely.

It is predicted the Emu's will take no longer than 12 business days to entirely conquer the country.

A guerilla human resistance will be born within the no longer existing Canberra.


Led by Lee Lin Chin and Karl Stefanovic, the resistance will use guerrilla warfare tactics to slowly expand the human population of Australia once again.

Tony Abbott will fuck it all up. / Via

It is predicted he will eat too many onions, and the Emu army will follow his breath to the resistance's hideout.

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