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What Will Happen Now That It's Cold In Australia

The second great Emu war is upon us...

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Canberra will cease to exist.

Via theartisserie.tumblr.com

The country has to ration all it's energy and purpose, therefore as a cost cutting measure, Australia will no longer acknowledge the existence of Canberra. A large cloud of fog will fall over the city, and it will be replaced by a large lake on the Australian map.

Patrick Campbell

The second emu war will begin.

Via anuragshivach.tumblr.com

The Emu clans are naturally prepared for the winter with their thick feathers. They will use the Australian people's weakness to their advantage and launch a campaign to take over Australia entirely.

It is predicted the Emu's will take no longer than 12 business days to entirely conquer the country.

A guerilla human resistance will be born within the no longer existing Canberra.

Via satismouse.tumblr.com

Led by Lee Lin Chin and Karl Stefanovic, the resistance will use guerrilla warfare tactics to slowly expand the human population of Australia once again.

Tony Abbott will fuck it all up.

vine.co / Via pizzalovingbisexual.tumblr.com

It is predicted he will eat too many onions, and the Emu army will follow his breath to the resistance's hideout.

Lee Lin Chin will kill Abbott for treason, and an emu will rise from his dead body, proving he is an evil traitor.

Patrick Campbell

The emu army will attack the resistance, killing most.

Via woodywombpecker.tumblr.com

Only the strongest will escape, this means that Lee Lin Chin, Kevin Rudd, and Julia Gillard are the only survivors.

Julia Gillard will trip in the snow and die.

Via tumblr.com

It definitely had nothing to do with Kevin Rudd at all. Nonetheless LLC Kevin move on swiftly, abandoning Julia.

Kevin will succumb to the cold, but Lee Lin dressed for the weather so she's still fine.

"Even an emu war is no excuse for a fashion faux-pas." - Lee Lin Chin (probably.)
Via charlieno2.tumblr.com

"Even an emu war is no excuse for a fashion faux-pas." - Lee Lin Chin (probably.)

Lee Lin Chin will make a pact with the kangaroos.

Patrick Campbell

Together they will end the emu war once and for all.

The kangaroos will launch a full scale assault on the emu army, led by Lee Lin Chin.

Patrick Campbell

The final few emu warriors will surround Lee Lin Chin, but she will not be bothered.

Patrick Campbell

Lee Lin will show no mercy.

The final emu's will be obliterated, and Lee Lin will repopulate Australia through her sheer will.

Australia will be saved, and forever in Lee Lin Chin's debt.

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