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    Posted on Jan 15, 2015

    16 Oddly Specific Book Titles

    These book titles are telling you exactly what they are all about - kind of. If you ever thought you couldn't get published, consider the fact that all of these books somehow managed it.

    16. Cooking With Poo by Saiyuud Diwong

    Via cookingwithpoo.com

    I was oddly disappointed to discover that this is apparently a normal cook book, and not actually a book for cooking with fecal matter. The Thai author, Khun Saiyuud Diwong, goes by the nick name Poo, hence the title of the book. You can buy the book here.

    15. 101 Uses for a Dead Cat by Simon Bond

    Have you ever been haunted by the thought of what to do with your dead cat? No? Weird. Simon Bond thought about it enough to come up with 101 ways to use your dead cat. If for any reason you want to own this book, you can buy it here.

    14. How To Raise Your IQ by Eating Gifted Children by Lewis Frumkes

    amazon.com

    This sarcastic book has even wittier reviews. You can buy the book, or more importantly, read the reviews for it here.

    13. The Secret to Cooking for Cats by Martin Gardner

    amazon.com

    If you're useless cat isn't dead, you probably still need to feed it. Now you can unlock the secret of cooking for your feline with this amazing book. Buy it here.

    12. If God Loves Me, Why Can't I Get My Locker Open? by Lorraine Peterson

    Via amazon.com

    There must be a hot market for long-titled devotional novels for teens, because this book has sold more than 500,000 copies. You can buy the book here, although as one review has pointed out, "it has no advice for opening lockers!"

    11. My Name is Sus5an Smith. The 5 is Silent by Louise Plummer

    From the title and the cover, you would think this is another devotional teen novel, but apparently this is the story of a 17 year-old girl from Utah who must stand up to her "disapproving mother" to pursue her artistic dreams, but also apparently has a crush on her Uncle. Sus5an doesn't make good decisions. You can buy this book here.

    10. The Best Dad is a Good Lover by Charlie W. Shedd

    amazon.com

    This book just gets creepier and creepier as you look at it. The title, the cover, the review.... I'm hoping that no one ever buys this book, but if you want to read some witty comments on it, go here.

    9. The Stray Shopping Carts of Eastern North America: A Guide to Field Identification by Julian Montague

    amazon.com

    This "artistic photography" book is mostly just a bunch of pictures of abandoned shopping carts - which is probably exactly what you should have expected. Amazon calls it "a must-have for anyone with a passion for shopping carts." If you're one of those people, you can own this book here.

    8. Why Cats Paint: A Theory of Feline Aesthetics by Heather Busch and Burton Silver

    amazon.com

    This "unprecedented" book is what happens when someone decides "lets give cats paint and see what happens." The ironic wit and professionalism with which the book is written only adds to the experience. Buy the book here and give it to everyone you know.

    7. How to Rule the World: A Handbook for the Aspiring Dictator by Andre de Guillaume

    amazon.com

    Listen, becoming a dictator is hard. There's a lot to consider. That's why this book gives you advice and tips on ruling the world, from creating your own flag to stopping free speech. Buy the book here and get one step closer to your dreams of dictatorship.

    6. The Beginner's Guide to Sex in the Afterlife: An Exploration of the Extraordinary Potential of Sexual Energy by David Staume

    amazon.com

    Let's be clear here, this book is only for the "recently deceased" so that they can learn all about sexy ghost stuff. If you're dead but having a hard time figuring out how all of it works, pick up this informative book here.

    5. The Big Book Of Lesbian Horse Stories by Alisa Surkis and Monica Nolan

    amazon.com

    You had me at "lesbian horse stories." This collection of short stories revolving around horse riding lesbians will leave you wondering - "will the stables ever be safe again?" Read reviews and buy the book here.

    4. How to Survive a Garden Gnome Attack. Defend Yourself When the Lawn Warriors Stike (and They Will) by Chuck Sambuchino

    amazon.com

    The Gnomeo and Juliet movie may have been on to something. Learn how to protect yourself from garden gnomes with (what I can imagine) is the only book on the market for gnome defense. Buy your copy here before the gnomes can get to you.

    3. Make Your Own Sex Toys. 50 Quick and Easy Projects - with Step-by-Step Pictures! A Practical Guide to a Better Love Life by Matt Pagett

    amazon.com

    If the title didn't draw you in, the pictures on the cover certainly did. I'm not sure what you can make with a hammer, some rulers, an orange slice, and the thickest chinstrap beard I have ever seen, but I'm excited. Buy this glorious book here and get yourself a better love life.

    2. Goblinproofing One's Chicken Coop and Other Practical Advice in Our Campaign Against the Fairy Kingdom by Reginald Bakeley

    amazon.com

    Not the chicken coop! If it's not gnomes, it's fairies. Learn more about our "campaign against the fairy kingdom" here.

    1. The Jewish-Japanese Sex& Cook Book and How to Raise Wolves by Jack Douglas

    This book is out of print now, presumably because of this amazing title, although you can still get your hands on used copies here.

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