Mitt Romney strikes me, so hard.
Makes me feel like Shirley Sherrod.
Out of context, those words aren’t mine.
The private sector’s doing fine.
Feels good, when the economy’s weak,
Responding with a national security leak.
Osama Bin Laden, I killed.
And that was a mission you didn’t build.
If you’ve given three dollars before,
I’m asking again for a few dollars more.
Clint Eastwood and the empty chair
Would be bettter than this Republican pair.
Shut up, it’s my turn.
Let’s rap together. Go ahead. You’ve got a lot to learn.
Mr Ryan and his voucher retailin’.
Maybe he’s just a brighter shade of Palin.
Mr Romney…and his friends on Wall Street.
What I’m saying is they’re SuperPacking Heat.
And here is a woman Mitt killed.
But that was an attack ad you didn’t build.
[JENNIFER GRANHOLM BREAKS IT DOWN]
The race is still in play.
So I gotta be careful about what I say.
And so, from the Australian nation,
I’ll be introducing the Strine translation.
The Republican party in the debt ceiling fight.
Ravings of the eccentric, lunar right.
There are those who don’t believe my birth certificate.
There are nut jobs on the internet.
To your guns keep on clinging.
To myself I’ll be singing…
“I so in love with you.”
What we need now is the Colbert Bump.
But, just for a minute lets all do the Trump.
Trump, Trump, Trump. Yeeeaah. Not bad, huh?
[HULK HOGAN INTERVIEW]
Hogan, this is the real American booking.
Do you smell what Barack is cooking?
Morning in America? Not quite.
It’s pre-dawn, but we will soon see the light.
Financial straits remain dire.
You’ve got to remember I did not start this fire.
It was Notorious G.O.P.
And if you choose to vote for me,
I will not just call you maybe.
I am ready to go all the way, baby.
That promise will be fulfilled.
So join this chorus, you didn’t build.
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