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10 Pro Tips For Fighting With A Friend

Whether you're fighting with your sister for borrowing your new sweater or confronting your roommate for stealing the last avocado, here's ten tips to help you fine-tune you confrontational literacy.

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1. Don't avoid it!

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While it may seem easier at the time, avoiding confrontation with your friends only leaves you open to more frustration and resentment. How do you expect anything to change if you don't talk about it? Keeping an open line of communication is the only way to truly maintain a healthy relationship.

2. Be aware

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Be aware of your surroundings and setting before jumping straight into the thick of the conversation. Are you in a place where others might be listening and judging your conversation? Is it 3 AM the night before a stressful midterm? Or are you driving on a windy, dark road? If yes, consider picking a new time where you can give each other your full attention.

3. Think before you say

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Before confronting someone, spend some time thinking about what you really want to say, and what you should really avoid bringing up. Plan out what you want to say so you don't forget, or even worse, create a new problem. It is also important to understand that there are some things that are not appropriate for any argument with a friend.

4. Don't let your emotions distract you

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If you're taking the time to read this post, then the situation you are frustrated with is probably somewhat serious. Starting an argument while enraged or devastated is only going to cloud your judgement. You might find yourself using criticism or blame, taking an aggressive tone, or saying something you might regret. Take some time, breathe, and then go into the confrontation calm and collected.

5. Don't fight over text

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Its quite possible that the person reading your text, email, tweet, etc., will misinterpret your tone, wording, or level of seriousness. Texting not only leaves your problem open to interpretation, but also to the interpretation of anyone else who reads it.

6. Be direct...but not mean

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In any argument, it is important to get straight to the point and stand your ground. Don't be embarrassed of your options and don't be afraid to voice them. However, there is a fine line between proving your point and attacking your friendship. Saying remarks such as "I just don't like you," "you suck," or "I hate you," do not support your argument and only create more tension.

7. Don't interrupt

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JUST. DON'T. DO. IT.

Interrupting is the least effective way to communicate your ideas. How can you argue your point if you can't even listen to what the other person is saying? If it didn't work for Trump, it probably won't work for you.

8. Choose words carefully

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In any argument, try using "I" instead of "you" to make your friend feel more comfortable and less defensive. Also refrain from using name calling and other rude remarks.

9. Be aware of the of each others thoughts and feelings

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Its quite possible that your friend is feeling the same way, or is even be upset with you as well. Be open to their criticism because collaboration can create the best solution to any argument. Its important to also understand that no matter how strongly you believe you are right, being rude and aggressive in your argument is not the way to solve anything.

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