1. Huh. Still not feeling any type of way. I’ve probably grown immune to weed.
2. LOL JUSTKIDDING IT JUST HIT ME. I’M ON MY WAY UP. HERE WE GO.
3. Damn, I had dinner not even an hour ago and I can enjoy the shit out of a burrito right now.
4. Are the walls moving in or am I just growing bigger?
5. Is the world moving underneath me or am I moving on top of it?
6. Yo…cereal, though.
7. Who knew the divinity of Lucky Charms could reach new heights?
8. I was just thinking—
9. I just forgot what I was just thinking.
11. I wonder if anyone knows I’m high.
12. I bet everyone on this train knows I’m high.
13. They totally know I’m high hehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehe.
14. I’m craving everything but I physically cannot peel myself off of this couch.
15. What do I already have in my fridge…
16. Half a block of cheese, hot sauce, and pita bread: Challenge accepted.
17. OH MAN SPICY CHEDDAR PITA BREAD IS AMAZING. THIS IS BRILLIANT, ME. I’M A CULINARY TRAILBLAZER.
18. I should make this all the time.
19. I wonder if my perception of reality is the same as everyone else’s… like, are we all seeing the same thing or are all realities uniquely different from each other and they somehow work in conjunction so we can communicate and coexist?
21. Do we all see the same colors? Why do we call the colors what we do? What if someone else’s name for “blue” is a different color than what I’ve associated it with?
22. I wonder if I’m my TRUE self when I’m high. Because when I’m sober, I’m inhibited with all of these social rules and restraints.
23. Fuck society.
24. And the shackles of its repressive hegemonies.
25. Quicksand is crazy.
26. Mmmm ~tingles~
27. Mmmm ~body rolls~
28. MMMMMMM ACTUAL ROLLS. Still hungry.
29. I could really go for some fries. With a side of fries.
30. Or a plate of XXL fully loaded nachos.
31. Or ice cream encased in soft mochi pillows that leave a delightful layer of sugar dust on your lips.
32. Or a bowl of hot tender ramen aromatically steaming into my nose as my eyes well up with water.
33. I now understand Adventure Time.
34. And the other Cartoon Network shows of my childhood.
35. The creators were definitely high as fuck when they conceived this.
36. Any cartoon creator has to be high as fuck when they conceive anything.
37. Jay Z and Beyoncé are definitely in the Illuminati. Then they recruited Kanye and Kim.
38. And appointed Celine Dion as the ringleader.
39. Yes, it makes the world make more sense now.
40. How many mozzarella sticks have I already ingested? I’ve lost count.
41. I can literally eat 400 more.
42. A lamp.
43. Remember when your 8-year-old self went rollerblading around the house and knocked into a lamp and the shade fell on your head? That was hilarious.
44. That was HIGH-larious.
45. Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha. Good one, me.
46. Oh, lamps.
47. ALICE IN WONDERLAND IS SO FUCKED UP; WHO CAME UP WITH THIS SHIT?
48. Wow, there’s actually a narrative arc to Looney Tunes.
49. The Roadrunner is such an asshole.
50. So is Bugs Bunny.
51. Have five hours or five minutes passed? Think carefully. Damn, I really can’t tell.
52. Time, man…
53. If we just warp our sense of time, we’ll have more hours in a day.
54. Time is manufactured.
55. So are we.
56. Am I even here?
57. Are we here?
58. What does it even mean to be here, in the present?
59. Are there multiple presents and presence simultaneously happening alongside each other?
60. Time is definitely not linear. Shit’s fucked up and no one is speaking up about it.
61. We are so small.
62. An insignificant particle in the universe that expands to infinite spaces.
63. How does the universe keep expanding?!
64. I CAN’T WRAP MY HEAD AROUND THE IDEA OF INFINITY AND FOREVER. IT’S MAKING MY HEAD IMPLODE ON ITSELF. AM I THE ONLY ONE HERE OR IS THERE REALLY ANYTHING OUTSIDE OF MYSELF?
65. Everything is a conspiracy and you can’t trust anyone.
66. I’ve literally been blazed for 18 straight hours with no end in sight. When will this end? Will I ever get off this ride?
67. Just close your eyes, just close your eyes.
68. O0o0o0o0o space.
69. O0o0o0o0o darkness. ZzZzZZzzzZzZzzzZzZzZzZZzzZzZzZzZzZzZzZzzzzZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzZzZzZzZzz.
- Donald Trump's campaign CEO Stephen Bannon and an associate were accused of sexual harassment in a 1990s court case.
- And Apple has to repay up to €13 billion ($14.5 billion) in illegal tax benefits to Ireland, the European Commission has ruled.