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For Anyone Who Is A Proud And Self-Respecting Scaredy Cat

Do not be shamed this Halloween.

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Halloween is approaching and the common discourse among your friends has been around the completely masochistic amusement of scary things and being scared.

I love Halloween & getting scared & scary movies & all of that 😍👻🎃

eileen varela ?@EileenVarelaFollow

I love Halloween & getting scared & scary movies & all of that

3:14 PM - 26 Oct 14ReplyRetweetFavorite

That is not you. Because scary things actually scare you.

buzzfeed.com

LIKE A NORMAL PERSON.

And you should not be shamed for this! Because it's OKAY if...

You do not get a ~thrill~ having your heart palpitated from being touched in a haunted house.

You do not enjoy being traumatically mind-fucked after a scary movie.

Paramount Pictures

Because you will be living in fear and paranoia for at least a week after: You will retreat to being a 5-year-old...

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(^^^sorry)

Running to your bed after you turn off the lights at night...

Flinching at every creak and chirr around your house...

...And surveying your room one last time for unseen bodies before you fall asleep.

20th Century Fox

You don't find masked STRANGERS on Halloween night to be sexy or titillating.

And figuring out who's dressed up and who's actually a psycho killer.
Creative Commons / Flickr: downtowntraveler

And figuring out who's dressed up and who's actually a psycho killer.

You don't believe in "summoning" ghosts. Just... homie don't play dat.

You need a babysitter with you to watch American Horror Story.

You also do not think those internet prank stunts are funny OR cute.

You have fallen into cardiac arrest after watching those pop-up "gotcha!" prank videos your friends used to send around.

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"Hey, watch this," they said.

"Is it scary?"

"Just keep watching," they said.

Nope.

Nope.

Nope.

Nope.

Nope.

Nope.

If you're not cool or BAMF enough to ~appreciate horror~, do not listen to your friends: It does not mean you're not fun. It just means you're SANE.

Spoopy > Spooky 4 life.

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