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Here's All The Drama You Missed From "The Bachelor" Australia Finale

Richie's mum was the star of the show, and Australia actually exploded.

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Missed the finale of The Bachelor Australia, or maybe just didn't want to sit through the 90 minutes of dribble? Here's what happened.

Alex meeting Richie's family:

Alex was worried to meet Richie’s family because she’s a single mum... I'm glad she clarified she’s single, otherwise that could be a real disaster.

Alex subtly dropped in she’s a mum by yelling "I'M A MUM", and Richie’s mum, Kate, gave an abrupt “Well... that’s interesting”. You'd kinda think Richie could’ve taken one for the team and told them beforehand, but whatever. Kate then stayed stoney-faced throughout the chat of Alex’s son, and I nearly felt like someone would have to wave a hand in front of her face to make sure she was still with us.


Kate then took Alex aside and literally said the phrase “as a mum” AND IT WAS PROBABLY THE HIGHLIGHT OF THE SHOW.
Tbh Alex handled herself pretty amazingly under the line of fire. Kate asked her if she’s explained to Richie the full responsibilities of having a child, such as, you know, tantrums. Apparently Richie doesn’t understand how children work.

“So hit me with it, ha ha,” Richie said to Kate after she'd finished with Alex. And straight away his mum called him Richard, so we know he’s in trouble. Can we cast our minds back to last year when both Sam Wood and his dad were thrilled at Snez admitting she had a child? Anyway. Kate not so much.

Nikki meeting Richie's family:

Nikki, as per usual, was excited to meet the family, because I think you could literally say anything to Nikki and she’d be excited.

“I came into this to have a good time,” Nikki said to Kate, inadvertently admitting she had missed the whole premise of the show, but is happy to be there nonetheless.

“Miss chill turning into miss grill,” Kate said after Nikki admitted she left a 12-year relationship last year. I’m not really sure what Kate meant, so I guess Richie has inherited that slightly confusing gene.

“I’m looking forward to the grilling,” Nikki said to Kate, once again proving to me that Nikki is literally excited for anything. Kate stared Nikki in the eyes, and asked if she’s ready for a relationship after such a long one and Nikki gave some perfect answer that used the classic "had to find myself" reasoning.

“So you’re not a basketcase,” Kate asks. LMAO. WHAT?! Anyway Nikki convinced Kate she’s not there to play games like basketball, and let’s be real, Kate absolutely LOVED her. AND both Kate, and Richie's sister who's name I forget, think Nikki would fit into the family perfectly. So godspeed.

Nikki's single date:

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Nikki and Richie took a helicopter over the sights of Bali, and Richie once again pretended he had planned the whole date, even though they're in BALI and like honestly, where would he find the time?! The two fed some monkeys and it was so weirdly adorable... the monkeys that is, they were honestly the cutest part of the whole show.

Nikki decided it was the last chance to tell him how she feels, even though she’s literally told him TWICE now that she loves him. Anyway third time lucky I guess. They pashed, because we all know Richie loves a good pash to seal the deal.

Alex's single date:

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Richie took Alex on some sort of boat, but this time there was no rum to be seen, just champagne. Alex decided to cut straight to it, giving Richie some "As a mum" scenarios, such as, if Elijah got sick, they’d have to cancel plans and how does that make Richie feel? Richie said the same old spiel about constantly thinking about these kind of situations, without really giving a proper answer.

So, done and dusted, the two promptly jumped into the water. She then whipped out a poem, and I slowly melted into a pile of embarrassment, as she said something about being excited to find out the kind of man Richie would be. Which. Is. Confusing. Because. She. Already. Knows. Him.

Anyway, she also said she loved him, and they pashed.

THE FINAL CHOICE:

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OK, so for the first time this season I actually got really nervous and felt weirdly invested. The gold shoe made me think Alex was the first out of the limo, then the red dress followed and I knew that the beautiful, precious flower Nikki would be getting her heart broken, and honestly WHAT THE FUCKING FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK.

Richie then professed his love for Alex, while I silently sobbed into my wine, giving up on love forever. Look OK, I'm happy they both found "love", but honestly call me back when Nikki is the new bachelorette.

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