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We Explain What Happened In Episode 5 Of "The Bachelor" In Under 90 Seconds

Nobody puts baby in the corner. Unless you're Megan.

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The Solo Date:

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"As a mum" Alex ABSOLUTELY didn’t think this would happen anytime soon, which literally makes one of us. Upon greeting her, compliments generator Robot Richie awkwardly spat out a “you look stunning” laugh. Alex was super surprised at the thought Robot Richie put into the date, which we all know is absolutely zero. I think they had high tea, but I also temporarily fell asleep because the date was about as vanilla as the cupcakes in front of them.

“As a mum” Alex wasn’t sure if Robot Richie understood that she had a child. Turns out he did. Someone sang for them and they danced and then they kissed, and you got it, Richie said “wow”.

The Group Date:

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We enter the group date to babies crying. And then we find out there’s also some random baby dolls there too! "You can’t put babies in a corner," says Eliza, but it honestly doesn’t sound like she’s tried hard enough.

Richie enters with his own baby and helpfully tells the ladies he has the doll “strapped to his chest” in case their eyes fell out when their ovaries exploded. Nikki won solo time with Richie and asked if he wanted babies, and then they kissed because honestly, Richie can't stop kissing all of them.

The Cocktail Party:

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Nikki let the girls know she pashed Richie, and "As a mum" Alex is shocked that Richie had the nerve to kiss ANYONE else, even though she signed up for the show knowing he would be dating numerous women.

"As a mum" Alex contemplated not using the white rose power, but alas, she waved it to Robot Richie and he followed her to the secret sex attic like a puppy who knows he's done something wrong.

The Rose Ceremony:

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Richie picked out his fave blondes, before letting a couple of stray brunettes in.

Down to the final rose, Richie rubbed his forehead anxiously as he sent Eliza home. He was probably extremely nervous about this decision, as there was always a chance she’d sing her way out, but she spared us this time around.

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