50 Cent Made A Song About The Death Of Osama Bin Laden
A collaboration with his protege, Hot Rod, cleverly/subtly/allegorically/poetically titled "Osama bin Laden is Dead." It's got a sick beat for dancing away your humanity. Just wait for the awesome Charlie Sheen break down. Trust me, you'll be humming this as it drives you to stick your head in the oven.
So Guess What This Guy Was Doing When He Was Pulled Over
If you saw the previous installment of Police Report Theater, then you can hazard a guess. This man was arrested for drunk driving after plowing through the tape of a crime scene in Portland, Oregon. We'll let the reporter from Fox 12 fill you in on what police found in his car. He was, uh, "driving a manual." Seriously though...twice in one week?
Naked Guy Gets Punched Out At Concert
Photographs of a stark raving naked man at the very moment he was decked in the face for nudely grinding on people at the Ultra Music Festival. We didn't have to make the censor badges very big, if you catch our innuendo about his small genitals. More, including video, over at Barstool Boston.
Paris Hilton 'Can't Stand Black Guys'
In a passage that wasn't published in his new book, author and journalist Neil Strauss recounts a run-in he had with Paris Hilton in which she admitted she "can't stand black guys." The whole exchange is pretty jaw-dropping. And if you didn't pick it up from the "Saving Private Ryan" hint, they're talking about Vin Diesel.
The Situation's Banned Jokes, Presented By The Leprechaun
The Situation's comedy routine at the roast of Donald Trump was instantly hailed the worst thing ever, but it somehow just got worse. Comedy Central deemed a joke aimed at Snoop Dogg as too racist and cut it from the broadcast. Here is that joke, plus a few more offensive cracks at the expense of Marlee Matlin and Larry King that were omitted, as told by the The Leprechaun from "Leprechaun." Y'know, because it's St. Patrick's Day. Shut up.
The Charlie Sheen Winning Game (Game Battle)
It's been a long day of heartbreaking news. Let's unwind with the definition of frivolous: a Charlie Sheen Flash game where you run over pedestrians and prostitutes with a car. Once you power up with tiger blood, you can blow up ambulances. Surprisingly diverting!
Fred Phelps Fan Art
The Supreme Court ruled that the anti-gay demonstrations of the Westboro Baptist Church, including picketing military funerals, were protected by the First Amendment. Here are some other folks exercising their First Amendment rights by paying homage to Westboro Baptist Church founder Fred Phelps. These are the handful circulating around the internet that aren't X-rated.
Woman Freaks Out And Destroys Auto Repair Shop
A woman in Michigan upset by her bill proceeds to trash an auto repair shop, throwing things and smashing windows. Fortunately for the internet, a camera crew happened to be on the scene. It turns into a horror movie at about the 2:00 minute mark when the reporter is cowering in a closet and calling 911. Gripping!
James Franco Sings Cher Very Poorly
James Franco recently posted this audio clip on Twitter of him singing Cher's "You Haven't Seen The Last of Me." It's a song from "Burlesque," and he murders it stone dead. Thank God he discovered Twitter. They should fire Anne Hathaway and have James Franco host the Oscars with Twitter, because they make quite a team.
Another Tumblr dedicated to an advice macro, this time focusing on Justin Bieber's recent interview with Rolling Stone. The passage inspiring this meme: “I really don’t believe in abortion,” Bieber says. “It’s like killing a baby?” How about in cases of rape? “Um. Well, I think that’s really sad, but everything happens for a reason."