"Lonely. I'm so lonely. I have nobody to call my own."
Du hast immer Pech mit Dates? Sieh's mal so, immerhin bist du noch nicht mit einem Meth-Dealer ausgegangen.
Coffee tells no lies.
It's written in the decor.
Hopefully you won't get your heart broken.
You delete Tinder only to download it again three days later.
Beauty products tell all.
Eat your heart out.
Date nights never stop.
Food decides everything.
Rauchmelder installieren, Leute!
Will you fly solo or finally have a coffee date?
Alam mo yung Do Re Mi? Do Re Mi gusto ako sa 'yo.
No shame in being alone on Valentine's Day.
Being single doesn't mean you don't deserve a quality meal.
Does your morning routine involve waking up next to someone?
Is Ed Sheeran overrated?
Who cares about being single when puppies exist?
S/o to everyone who's third, fifth, and seventh-wheelin' it out there.
"I look 89 years old"
Are you going to be forever alone?
#19 Fighting over how to squeeze the tube of toothpaste.
Don't think about the money!
Will you live happily ever after?
All the single ladies.
I'm sorry for who I am.
Grab some wine!
Me: So when are we gonna start pregaming for this party? Future husband: Um, this is our son's third birthday party.
Party planning doesn't lie, my friend.
Will you be kissing under the mistletoe?
They'll find their own way to thank you.
A hilarious array of boozy, punny, and fandom sweaters you'll be proud to wear because ugly really is just a state of mind.
Single and ready to mingle?
Go ahead and eat your feelings.
*Becomes a safecracker*
How angry do tandem bikes make you?
"Gotta get down on Friday."
"My life is like a romantic comedy except there's no romance and it's just me laughing at my own jokes."
Here comes the bride...
"I was late because I had to find all the things that were in plain sight for my husband."
People who say "I have no idea why you are single" are basically saying "There must be something wrong with you".
Going to cut someone if I hear "You're next" one more time.
I guess I'm ready to love myself.
Single and ready to mingle!!!!! (just kidding, i have netflix)
Loving horror movies doesn't mean you'll be single forever.
All ~daddies~ may apply...unless you got a wife, FWB, or baby mama drama.